From: SAAVIK              
To: CRYSTAL             
Subject: Huh-uh         
Date & Time: 05/01/91 14:12:51
Message Number 16378

It was the same way when my husband and I opened our relationship.... 
the problems started with "other" partners (they became jealous first) 
and that bled over into our relationship, when we saw that happening, 
we decided to call a halt..... As I said, we have been monogamous for 
many years now, and I'm not certain that I could return to an open 
marriage.... but I do know that if my husband wanted that.... he would 
talk to me about it.... 
Usually we communicate very well.... but he is a moody person and some-
times he builds these walls around him that I can't penetrate.... this
I can not learn to deal with no matter how I try... I always take it 
personally. I think that this is one of the flaws in our marriage. 
Whenever he puts that wall up, I start harping on him trying to get 
through, this agravates him further and I get my feelings hurt.... when
my feelings are hurt, I cry.... and when I cry, it makes him even more
shut off and angry...... so a small situation becomes a major stress 
bath until we finally talk...... which is sometimes a day or two later.
Meanwhile we both go around moping and feeling miserable...stupid eh? 
Except for when the wall is up, (which happens more and more lately) we
can talk about anything.......