* Forwarded (from: netmail) by Roy J. Tellason using timEd 1.01.
The multiple choice test below gives the audience and the [missing Clinton 
supporters] a range of options for explanation. 
1.  Where were spokespersons for NOW and NARAL? 
a. They couldn't speak because they could not tell who was telling the truth. 
b. They cannot oppose a sexual predator who has felt their pain so much and 
furthered their pro-abortion agenda -- regardless of how he uses women. 
c. They could not defend Lewinsky because of class distinctions (e.g., more 
trailer park trash, to use the delicate Carvillism). 
d. They could not attack Bill without making Hillary look more submissive 
than the wimpiest [Promise Keeper wife].
e. All of the above. 
2.  Where were the rabid "Shut down the Government" Republican congressional 
leaders? 
a. No one could locate five who hadn't also had phone sex with their interns. 
b. They did not believe the press because of the press's reputation for 
distortion; "Too good to be true," muttered several -- off the record. 
c. Newt ordered them all to talk and man the talk shows; that's why they were 
absent.
d. They were implementing the Lee Atwater line: "When your enemy is 
committing suicide, don't help him."
e. Most of the above. 
3.    Where was Al Gore? 
a. On a goodwill mission to Iraq. 
b. Desperately offering to do the Macarena at any High School in South 
Dakota. 
c. Meeting with friends selecting the next cabinet.
d. Meeting with his lawyers to deny that he ever knew Clinton. Not only did 
he never have an improper relationship with Clinton; Gore never knew him at 
all. 
e. All of the above. 
4.  Where was Hillary? 
a. On one last shopping binge. 
b. Standing by her man . . . Kicking his rear on the half hour.
c. Meeting with press officers to see if she should file for a divorce and 
ask to keep only the house, thereby filing the expired term of her disgraced 
husband.
d. Asking Eleanor Roosevelt, "Did Franky do this on you? How many times?" 
e. Petitioning the "village" to reign in her hubby.
5.  Who would the Prez send out Sunday, and with what message? 
a. Ann Lewis: "It's Tony Snow's fault; Barney Frank is a great American." 
b. David Gergen: "The President should confess at the State of the Union and 
seek national forgiveness."
c. Paul Begala:  "He's denied it; there's nothing to this; he'll be 
vindicated in the end."
d. James Carville:   
 "Datjustabsurdskuzzyyakantjuscalldepredentany-  
oltangyouwantskuzzyandbesmudgehisskuzzycharacter-withanotherdelusionalwomyn. 
Pass the jumbalaya please."
e. Madeline Albright: "Is it time to wake up already!  Everyone take a breath 
and bring me some coffee."
6.  Who looked good, after previously having been mocked? 
a. Gennifer Flowers and Paula Jones, among others. 
b. Ken Starr, who was on the short list for the high court in the Bork days; 
he may yet be back.
c. The Rutherford Institute 
d. The American Spectator, the Arkansas Troopers, Matt Drudge, and The Wall 
Street Journal.
e. Rush and Michael Issikoff. 
7.    Where was Bill? 
a. Picking out this year's tie for his State of the Union address, and hoping 
that Monica Lewinsky would not show up in a navy dress.
b. Picking out an intern with whom to view this year's State of the Union 
address.
c. Lining up a fishing trip with Dick Morris.
d. Thinking up jokes and practicing his sax to break the tension when no one 
applauds at the State of the Union.
e. Reading The American Spectator to get his facts straight. 
8. What will Clinton's Approval rating be in one week (plus or minus 5%)? 
a.    55% 
b.    60% 
c.    65% 
d.    70% 
e.    75% 
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