Sondra,
  I am so very sorry to hear about your friends passing.  I know of what the 
daughter was referring to when she talks about disapperance of the person 
leaving this life and heading on to the next.  I can recall one lady that was 
so very wonderful that I care for very deeply.  She had been revivved a 
couple pf times, and then the second time they also did surgery on her which 
didn't heal.  We talked often and she said that if she should die while I was 
with her, that I should make sure that she had sucked her last breath before 
calling for help.  The time finally came, and I was there with her, she faded 
a bit, and then spoke faintly, slowly, and very deliberate "remember what I 
said" with the look in her eye I that I couldn't have mistaken what she was 
referring to. I held her hand tighly, and said, "I am here, and I will be 
with you, and hold your hand until you reach out your other hand and are 
heaven bound".  Her breathing slowed, and then she turned to me with a faint 
smile on her face, and she was gone.  I was so stunned that I couldn't have 
called for help if I had to at that moment.  I sat by her bedside and looked 
at her, and saw that for once she had no pain, and she was happy, and she was 
most beautiful.  I was so very greatful to have been given the opportunity to 
be with her at that moment.  I too have many elders as friends, and with the 
knowledge that they pass on, they can also pass on some interesting views on 
leaving this plane and passing on to the other.  My parents have asked me to 
make certain that they have a respectful and dignified death....out of love 
for them I will do just as they have asked regardless of what I may think or 
feel.  Be joyful that your one friend didn't have to suffer, that it was 
quick, and that he had touched so many peoples lives.  Your other friend 
probably left as many memories on the face of the planet also, even though he 
wasn't world reknown.....as a rock splashes the water most near the entry, 
death also has the greatest effect, but as the water ripples to the shore, so 
does the effect of the death on the community as a whole....each person 
touching anothers.
                                        Patti
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