Sorry about the caps--I snagged Politically Incorrect Monday night
and the Close Captioning is all in caps. But I thought you all might
want to hear what Joan Rivers had to say...
[Back from break]
Bill: NOW, THAT THING YOU HAVE DRAPED ACROSS...NOW, THAT'S A REAL FUR.
Joan: YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT!
Bill: YOU KNOW I'M A BOARD MEMBER OF PETA.
Joan: OH DON'T!
Bill: I HATE IT THAT YOU WANT TO...
Joan: THEY SPRAYED ME, THOSE B*ST*RDS!
[ LAUGHTER ]
Joan: THEY *SPRAYED* ME!
Bill: I KNOW. AND I THINK THAT'S WRONG. THAT IS WRONG.
Joan: ALL RIGHT...AND LET ME TELL YOU, YOU'RE SITTING THERE IN YOUR
LEATHER SHOES AND YOUR LEATHER BELT...ALL RIGHT, I WILL NEVER WEAR
FUR AGAIN IF YOU TATTOO ACROSS YOUR CHEST: "I AM A MEMBER OF PETA.
IF I AM IN TROUBLE WITH AN ACCIDENT DO NOT GIVE ME AN I.V. DO NOT
GIVE ME INSULIN. DO NOT GIVE ME ANTIBIOTICS."
?: A HAMBURGER?
Joan: YOU MIGHT WANT TO PUT A FOOTNOTE. "DO NOT GIVE ME MORPHINE."
...YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND?
Bill: NO.
Joan: YOU CANNOT BE A MEMBER OF PETA AND SAY, "DON'T DO THIS TO
ANIMALS." DO YOU AGREE WITH ANIMAL TESTING?
Bill: NO, I DON'T.
Joan: I DON'T EITHER, BUT I DO AGREE THAT I CAN WEAR THIS. (hugs fur)
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
AND I THINK YOU HAVE TO DIFFERENTIATE.
Bill: WELL, I'VE GOT A CAN OF PAINT RIGHT HERE...
[ LAUGHTER ]
Joan: AND I'LL SPRAY YOU WITH CHER'S PERFUME. YOU'LL REALLY SMELL.
[ LAUGHTER ]
Joan: THIS KEEPS YOU WARM. SHOW ME AN ESKIMO IN A COTTON COAT!
[ LAUGHTER ]
Joan: WELL, THIS IS MY MOM'S. THIS WAS MY MOM'S 35 YEARS AGO.
Joan: I'M TOTALLY AGAINST TRAPPING.
Bill: RIGHT, GOOD.
Joan: I'M TOTALLY AGAINST INHUMANE KILLING. BUT WE ALSO ARE TALKING
ABOUT I WAS A JEWISH WOMAN IN THREE-INCH HEELS AND A 12-YEAR-OLD
COAT. THEY PUSHED PAST THREE PUSHERS AND TWO HOOKERS AND A CHILD
MOLESTER TO GET ME.
Bill: BECAUSE THEY KNEW YOU WOULD GIVE THEM GREAT PUBLICITY. AND
THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE DOING. AND THAT'S THE SAME WITH PAULA JONES.
SHE'S JUST GETTING PUBLICITY BECAUSE, YOU KNOW WHAT? WHEN YOU'RE THE
GIRLFRIEND OR THE ACCUSER OF A FAMOUS PERSON THEN YOU GET PUBLICITY.
Joan: AND MAY I SAY CLINTON HAS TO GIVE HER A MILLION DOLLARS IF SHE
DESCRIBES HIS ORGANS. CORRECT?
Bill: $2 MILLION, YES.
Joan: NO, $2 MILLION...IF SHE EXAGGERATES.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
[break]
... Animal rights wackos think animals are little people in fur coats.
___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.12
* LAKOTA v1.5
--- Alexi/Mail 2.02b (#10000)
---------------