-=> Quoting Maurice Kinal to Nancy Backus on 10-25-06  04:39 <=-

 NB>> I've told many a person, being single isn't the worst thing that 
 NB>> could happen to one...
 MK> Like everything it has it's upsides and downsides.  Overall lately I

Exactly.

 MK> think it is better then any alternative to it but that is probably
 MK> because I seem to be attracted to the independence and haven't met the
 MK> 'special' one to convince me otherwise.  Then again maybe I just prefer
 MK> the independence.  I wasn't unhappy being married most of my marriage
 MK> and certainly didn't become single to increase happiness, and if I did
 MK> then it didn't work.  Not to suggest that I am an unhappy single person
 MK> but instead that happiness wasn't the reason for either state of being.

Different strokes for different folks ("and so on and so
forth..." )

 NB>> Being married to, or in a close relationship with, a
 NB>> person that is good with and for you is a pleasure for sure, and 
 NB>> worth the effort that it takes to maintain the relationship.
 MK> I think that is true but being single that is probably easier to say
 MK> then do. 

When one is single, there are simply different types of relationships to
deal with.  But I wasn't intending that statement to put down any one
that was single, just to state the (mostly) positive side of not being
single before I stated the possible negative aspects thereof (which many
singles don't want to even consider, when they are hell-bent on getting
out of the "single state").

 NB>> But with someone
 NB>> that is nothing but trouble, well, one might better be on one's own. 
 MK> I doubt 'trouble' was in either of our minds when we each decided to
 MK> go it alone.  I think it had more to do with living completely
 MK> different lives the last few years of our marriage which didn't do
 MK> either of us any good.  We parted on good terms or at least the best
 MK> terms possible.  Our children have expressed they thought all breakups
 MK> were like that and were completely shocked to discover that wasn't true
 MK> with most breakups. 

It would appear that you had a reasonably good relationship then, even
to the breaking up of it.  Part of the work of keeping a relationship
going over the years is being able to still stay connected even when/if
developing different lives... sometimes not at all easy to do, and I can
see where that would lead to a parting of the ways.

 MK> Friends are good.  Speaking for myself I tend to lean slightly to
 MK> being a loner but not much of one.  I like to spend time alone but not
 MK> always.  I doubt I am antisocial but then again I am not exactly a
 MK> social butterfly either.  Currently I have a few close friends.  I find
 MK> you easy to talk to and I am sure if we shared a shot or two of scotch
 MK> we'd both have an enjoyable time chatting about this and that and
 MK> enjoying the moment. 

I'm somewhere between antisocial and a social butterfly myself.  Neither
one nor the other.  My husband is a bit more introverted than myself,
but he also enjoys some contact with others.  We both have always been
involved in helping others, in one way or another... AND value time
spent quietly away from people...   I agree, we'd probably have a
fine time, sipping our scotch and chatting away... :)

 NB>> She went back to her sock "kitten" gladly!    There
 NB>> are a lot of women out there who seem to be looking to
"mother" what
 NB>> they perceive as "strays"...  I think they really
don't know what 
 NB>> they really want any more than our cat did.  :)
 MK> I could use some new socks.  :-)
 MK> Looking at one I am currently wearing it is getting a tad too
 MK> 'religious' (ie holey).

:)  Yeah, the ones our cat's allowed to have are likewise quite
"religious"...  

ttyl       neb

... Oh, no! Not *ANOTHER* learning experience.

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