Deborah Terreson wrote:
> The New Good Wife's Guide, Revised for March, 2005.
>
>
> 1. Have the fridge stocked with beer and sandwich fixin's, for when
he gets

LOL!

> in... Don't try and make his mind up for him what he wants to eat.
He'll
> figure it out.
>
>
> 2. Don't take a shower before he gets home! If you do, there's always
the
> chance that you can run down the hot water - a nice hot steamy shower
is
> often what anyone freshly in from a long hard day at work really
wants.

If you have electric heat, a gas water heater may give you more hot
water for less money.  There's a capital expense, but also an ongoing
cost savings.  If you can get a payback period of three or less years,
I'd do it.  If it's over 5 years, it's probably better not to, unless
you really need the hot water.

Also, you can raise the temperature setting on your hot water heater,
but you have to be careful not to burn yourself, and I certainly
would't do it if I had kids.  Then your blend won't use as much hot,
and it will be there when he gets home.  I love it when my SO showers
before I arrive.

> 3. Ask him how his day went. Be prepared to listen to alot of grief,
but
> it's good to let him vent if he needs to. Get him a beer, while you
are at
> it.

Won't you also get yourself a beer?

> 4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part
of the
> house before he gets home.
>
> 5. Swiffer the house

I don't know about these.  I don't even notice if she hasn't cleaned.
I do notice when _she_ looks hot.

> 6. If you are lucky enough to HAVE a fireplace, the best thing to do
is
> stuff a hibachi in the firebox and throw a half bag of briquettes on
and
> suprise him with an indoor barbecue on the first rotten cold day of
the
> fall. If you live in an older building with fireplaces and apartments
in it,
> you can drive the neighbors insane with the delicious aroma.

Now that is a damn good idea.

[...]
> 9. Get him a beer.

And yourself.

[...]
> 12. Your goal: Make the house a sanctuary from the day's hassles.
>
> 13. Don't bitch at him first thing through the door. Give him time to
vent
> first.

Amen to that.  Some things can wait.

> 14. Let him stay out all night. Be mindful that when he does get
home, he's
> probably going to be incredibly drunk or hung over. Leave two
aspirins on
> the counter with a glass of water and let him deal. Get a nice nights
sleep
> and hog the whole bed while he's not in it.

The key to avoiding a hangover is to drink a lot of water before bed,
so I would give him more water.  Just buy a big bottle of Evian, and
thereafter, fill it with tap water.  One of my friends prefers to chug
gatorade, and he swears by it.  There are hangover prevention packets
you can buy at the gas station, but I've never tried one, nor do I know
anyone who has.

Also, suggest to your man that he drink vodka and not beer.  A vodka
Collins is a good, light drink, and vodka won't leave him with such a
terrible hangover.   It's even better to have vodka and water with a
bit of lemon squeezed in.  This is a low-calorie way to get trashed, if
he's watching his weight.  There's no need spending the extra money for
Stoli.  The house vodka is good enough.

> 15. If he's really trashed, aim him for the sofa. Put a small garbage
can
> nearby him, in case he pukes.

Or perhaps a big pot, with plastic on the floor around it.  He may not
be lucid enough to open the bag before hurling.

[...]



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