-> Thanks for the Howdy!  Ryan and I have been having a bit of a rough time
-> lately and I'm not sure why.  He seems to be feeling (as I interpret it) a
-> need to be as "different" from who he really is as possible.  Is this
-> common?  I mean, he went and got an earring (it looks good, but it just
-> isn't what I see as the REAL Ryan...know what I mean?), he's been driving
-> real fast, and he's just been different.  He claims he doesn't know why 
he's
-> acting this way and I believe him, but it sure is frustrating because if 
e
-> doesn't know what he's feeling, how can anyone else?  I'm also not sure if
-> I'm part of the problem.  You see, my sister just passed away suddenly 
she
-> was 27) and I'm EXTREMELY vulnerable.  Anything he does or says I take
-> personally.  It's really hard to see what the real problem is. Anyway,
-> thanks for writing back.
Well Jennifer, there could be any number of things causing the erratic
behavior.  I know personally, my wife tells me that I have a tendancy
towards changing suddenly like that.  Unfortunately this may be Ryan's way of
coping with the ADD/ADHD, as ADDer's we tend to get bored easily. Then
without warning we're off to find something new and exciting to overcome the
boredom and focus our minds on something.  The best bet right now, would be 
for
you to learn as much about ADD/ADHD as possible.  There are a couple of books
out that explain the disorder in ways that anyone can understand if they wish
to learn about the disorder.  "DRIVEN TO DISTRACTION" by Hallowell & Rattey 
s
a real good down to the basics type book, and then
"YOU MEAN I'M NOT LAZY STUPID OR CRAZY" by Kelley and Ramundo is good for
learning how ADD effects adults.
P.S. The driving fast, causes the adrenaline to stimulate the brain, making 
t
     easier to focus on the road.  Not that I'm advocating it, but just 
rying
     to explain the reason he may be doing this.
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