Graham B wrote:
> All,
>
> I'd like to thank everybody for offering advice on my original
posting.
> Some of you warned to be careful to make sure she is not a
'clockticker'.
> At first, she appeared to be career oriented, strictly in search of a

> relationship for companionship.  Now the talk has shifted to "how
much she
> likes her nieces and nephews" and how she "spoils her nieces and
> nephews"...and she has started asking me if I want to have children
> someday....

Just because she loves her nieces and nephews it doesn't mean she wants
kids of her own.  But asking you if you want kids is usually a warning
sign.  Unlikely but she may just want to see how you feel about them.

> Naturally, I've been giving a political answer and not saying yes
> or no, but what I think she is saying is "I want to have children
before its
> too late."

To be on the safe side just ask her is wants kids.  And, tell her that
you don't.  You don't have to specifically say that you don't want kids
with a 41 year old woman, just say that you don't want them.  See what
she says.

> If I wanted children, I'd be going after a 20 something, not her
> at age 41, duh!  Are these women THAT dense?

Some of them are.  And what's really scary is that they'll do anything
to get pregnancy.  Trick/lie, spend tens of thousands on fertility
treatments, be impregnated with 8 embryos.

> There are qualiteis about
> older women that are desirable, however, fertility is not one.  Why
is she
> asking me this?

Either she wants kid or she doesn't and wants to see where you stand.
Just tell her that you don't.  She probably thinks that 41 is not old
and that you're not thinking she too old to have kids with.
If you're thinking of having any sort of relationship with her just
tell her.

>  It is obviously clear to me that if I wanted children, I'd
> be looking at a younger age bracket, and not her.  Common sense
should tell
> her that being that I am interested in her, I most likely have no
desire for
> children.  Is my reasoning on track here?

Your instincts about her are probably right on but since you're
obviously worried about it just ask her.  Make sure she know how you
feel, and be sure to use your own condom, no matter what she says about
using birth control!

>
>
> "Graham B"  wrote in message
> news:gzlFd.666$0j5.392{at}fe08.lga...
> > I've recently met a 41 year old woman who was never married.  (I am
40)
> > She has been very candid about the fact that she has been career
oriented
> > and independent as the primary reason for not being married.  She
is very
> > passionate about her career and takes it seriously.    She also
mentioned
> > that she requires personal space and ideally would like to meet a
male who
> > is independent as she is.  Finally, she does not appear to be
desirous of
> > children.  I have a lot in common with her and at this point she
seems
> > very desirable.  However, a close friend of mine stated that
posting to
> > this newsgroup would he helpful to analyze it from a devil's
advocate
> > perspective.  Given the facts above, what is your honest opinion
regarding
> > the pros and cons of pursuing this relationship further.
> >



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