I'll send one more message.  Maybe this will help lighten things up.  This
came
from my sister-in-law.


Have you noticed anything fishy about the inspection teams arriving in Iraq? 
They're all men! 

How in the name of the United Nations does anyone expect men to find Saddams
stash? We all know that men have a blind spot when it comes to finding 
things. For crying' out loud! Men can't find the dirty clothes hamper. Men 
can't find the jar of jelly until it falls out of the cupboard and splatters 
on the floor.... and these are the people we have sent into Iraq to search 
for hidden weapons of mass destruction? 

I keep wondering why groups of mothers weren't sent in. Mothers can sniff 
out secrets quicker than a drug dog can find a gram of dope. Mothers can 
find gin bottles that dads have stashed in the attic beneath the rafters. 
They can sniff out a diary two rooms and one floor away. They can tell when 
the lid of a cookie jar has been disturbed and notice when a quarter inch 
slice has been shaved off a chocolate cake. A mother can smell alcohol on 
your breath before you get your key in the front door and can smell 
cigarette smoke from a block away. By examining laundry, a mother knows more 
about their kids than Sherlock Holmes. And if a mother wants an answer to 
question, she can read an offender's eyes quicker than a homicide detective. 

So... considering the value a mother could bring to an inspection team, why 
are we sending a bunch of old men who will rely on electronic equipment to 
scout out hidden threats? 

My mother would walk in with a wooden soup spoon in one hand, grab Saddam by 
the ear, give it a good twist and snap, "Young man, do you have any weapons 
of mass destruction?" And God help him if he tried to lie to her. She'd 
march him down the street to some secret bunker and shove his nose into a 
nuclear bomb and say, "Uh, huh, and what do you call this, mister?" Whap! 
Thump! Whap! Whap! Whap! And she would lay some stripes across his bare 
bottom with that soup spoon, then march him home in front of the whole of 
Baghdad. He would not only come clean and apologize for lying about it, h 
would cut every lawn in Baghdad for free for the whole damn summer. 

Inspectors my ass... You want the job done? Call my mother 


--- Rachel's Little NET2FIDO Gate v 0.9.9.8 Alpha