Confused Guy wrote:
> I'm feeling a bit down about being dumped by a 42 yr old never
married
> "career" woman.  Is this normal?  She was attractive and in great
physical
> condition, but something tells me she was not relationship material.
 She
> is far too attractive to never have had the opportunity for
marriage.... She
> required lots of personal space while I was involved with her, but
for some
> reason I was attached to her.  She also spent lots of time 'working
hard'.
> Nobody likes rejection, including myself...so guys please cheer me up
and
> enumerate through the reasons why she is over 40 and not married and
tell me
> all the bad things about her to lift my spirits.

Well I needn't tear her down to lift your spirits.  This isn't really
about her.  It's more about how you percieve and handle rejection.
It's such harsh word, isn't it?  Rejection.  But the concept isn't
harsh.

Being a man in the dating game is a bit like being a salesman.  If you
want to succeed at it, you have to tolerate rejection, because
rejection will always happen.  If a salesman can't handle it, he has go
find some other career, which is fine.  If a man can't handle it, he
has to stop the dating game, and that's fine too.

Rejection in dating is universal, so it doesn't mean that there's
something wrong with you, or that you screwed up somehow.  Indeed, the
truly unusual man would be the one who never got rejected.

So, if you want to continue at this, do as the salesman does.  Live
with the people who say no.  Find those who say yes.  You can't do the
latter without first doing the former.

As far as she goes, she may be uncomfortable with commitment or
intimacy. Perhaps she sensed that the two of you were getting close, so
she broke it off, and this may be the pattern she's been on for the
last 20 years.  Beyond that, it's not worth speculating.  The best you
can do is forget her and move on.



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