Evan Hunter, writing under his famous pseudonym of Ed McBain, seems
to be giving the real scoop behind the making of commercial bestsellers in 
his new novel.  I was clued in by Pat Holt in "Holt Uncensored."  For 
anyone who doesn't get that missive, read on.

"In "Fat Ollie's Book" (Simon & Schuster; 271 pages;
$25), a detective
named Ollie Weeks has ambition to, well, crack the bestseller list with
a novel about police work. When he finds a give-'em-what-they-want
publisher who sends him a letter with surefire steps called "IF YOU WANT
TO CRACK THE BESTSELLER LIST," Weeks is inspired.
The guide sounds like one of the old Plot-o-Meters from the pulp fiction
era, but perhaps not so surprisingly, the steps it describes, while
hilarious and silly, seem usable, important and *true.*
Take a look at the following from Hunter/McBain's novel and see if it
doesn't appear that many of today's thriller writers - Ludlum, Balducci,
Cussler, Deaver, Grisham (think of "The Pelican Brief"), Morrell,
Creighton and others - have followed it religiously:"
"IF YOU WANT TO CRACK THE BESTSELLER LIST
"1) YOU MUST CREATE A PLOT THAT PUTS AN ORDINARY PERSON IN AN
EXTRAORDINARY SITUATION....
"2) YOU MUST CREATE A PLOT THAT PLAYS OUT A UNIVERSAL FANTASY. Put the 
reader in a situation that tests him in ways he's always wanted to be 
tested, vicariously.
"3) YOU MUST COME UP WITH A PLOT THAT PASSES THE 'COOL' TEST. You must
find an idea that makes readers want to read the book simply on the
basis of the idea *alone*.
"4) YOUR PLOT MUST INVOLVE HIGH STAKES. You must make clear that the
fate of the world hangs in the balance - or, at least, the fate of a
character we desperately care about.
"5) YOU MUST INTRODUCE A TICKING CLOCK. You must give your protagonist
only a limited amount of time to solve his problem, and the reader
should be regularly reminded of the urgency via 'COUNTDOWN CUES.'
"6) BE SURE TO AVOID AMBIGUITY! You must avoid situations where points
in favor of both sides diminish the reader's ability to root intensely
for one side over another. For example: Novels about the IRA. Novels
about murky Central American conflicts. Novels about Pro Choice versus
Right-to-Life disputes.
"7) AVOID WRITING ABOUT WHAT'S IN THE NEWS! Editors ... will be seeing a
slew of books on *whatever* it is, believe me! Be especially wary of
plots about Computer Hackers, Genetic Engineering, Air Disasters,
Terrorist Attacks, etc."



Except for number seven, I find that lots of these rules hold true for the 
stuff that gets on the List.  (I still see lots of #7.  He's not saying 
those books don't get on The List, but simply that you'll have more 
competition and your plot might duplicate one that's already in the 
pipeline, thus reducing your chances of being picked up and pubbed.)

The list given above reminds me of the one that I once got from eluka bes 
shahar (Rosemary Edghill) after she volunteered to look at my manuscript . 
. . you remember, the one that I came and posted here.  It's kind of a 
"build your commercial book" list.
Hers was for fantasy.  I still believe that if I *could* write following 
her rules, the book would not only get picked up by a New York house, but 
it'd sell well.  However, I would not be interested in reading such a book, 
and thus I can't properly write a good one.

When I was doing the book signings for _Dulcinea_, I was distressed to find 
that even the patrons of the Borders stores around here are buying stuff 
that's on the BS list just because it's on the list.  And their reading 
expectations are apparently being met.  They seem to LIKE that sort of 
thing.  I don't know whether it's because they've never read anything else 
and don't know any better, or it's just a matter of mainstream taste.  The 
guy who demanded to know what I thought of Sidney Sheldon* was quite taken 
aback to find that I hadn't read and worshipped all the Sheldon novels out 
there.  He couldn't imagine a person reading "those literary things or that 
'classic' junk."  So there actually IS an audience for that 
best-selling-style stuff, unfortunately for those of us of a more
"elitist" 
or "literary" bent.

* I said, "Oh, yeah, the guy who created 'I Dream of Jeannie!'"  I'd noted 
his name on the show's credits. The man at the bookstore gaped, not knowing 
Sheldon was active in creating lots of sitcoms before he wrote novels.

The publishing houses are simply giving the crowds the bread and circuses 
that they will buy.  

I thought it was kind of neat that he got away with doing this.  I might go 
check the book out of the library, if the Homeland Security dept will let 
that book be carried, and if they actually get a copy of it along with the 
30 copies of whatever is on the BS List when they order new books for the 
library. . . .

Pretty cute that the char's name is Weeks, too.  (That's my married 
name.  The Welsh Weekses, mind, not the ones from Scotland.)
- - -
The only thing that flies faster than an F-16 is your guardian angel
- - - -
Nine out of ten doctors recommend reading my books.  The tenth is a quack.
Shalanna Collins   http://home.attbi.com/~shalanna/>
_Dulcinea: or Wizardry A-Flute_  (e-mail me 4 excerpt)  ISBN 0-7388-5388-7
New!  I'm trying out a blog/jrnl http://www.livejournal.com/users/shalanna/


--- Rachel's Little NET2FIDO Gate v 0.9.9.8 Alpha