G'morning Linda, 

 LB> Well I got you one on the other side of Heather...and Phil is on the
 LB> other side.  You'll all get along just fine...  :)

Oh goody.

My last abode was abysmal.

The neighbours kept banging on the walls all night, made worse by 
fools hammering on the floor and ceiling while naughty nitwits 
kicked at the door.

All night long,  and SO LOUDLY I could hardly hear the melody of 
the `Lament' I was rehearsing on my bagpipes...

 LB> One can still plunder it without wearing one...

But I'm a hacker !  Look, I bought my own chainsaw .

 LB> Don't know about that...it's a splendid device that you wear on your
 LB> head and hope you don't loose all your hair by the thrid hit/jolt.

Oh ... they put one of those on my collar to stop me barking...

 MM> Strait up ?
 LB> What, you want it on the rocks?

With a stick, please ... I'll soon curvulate your straight jacket. 
Turn it round, lengthen the sleeves and decorate it with straps 
and locks and - Bingo !,  a genuine Straitjacket fit for any 
Asylum...

 MM> Goodo - I'm more fowl than fish, actually...
 LB> I'm so hungry at the moment I'll take either!

Mmmm ... don't have any cannibal relations in Germany, do you ?

 MM> :-(
 LB> If you stand on your head you can make that frown turn into a smile you
 LB> know.

I fear that when I stand on my head, it takes ages for the 
bootprints on my nose and cheeks to heal...

:-(
 
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