Hi. I recently found my birth family. I am 28 and waited for the same
reasons you mentioned in your earlier posts. I have only met my birth
father, and just recieved a letter from my birth mother that she will be able
to visit in Nov. She lives in Wisconsin, i live in New Mexico. Although
both of us come from the different standpoints on the issue, seems we have
the identical fears of meeting. Of course i worry that she wont like me, i
wont live up to her standards, etc. On the other hand, while searching, the
fears of NEVER knowing was worse. Then, after talking to her, she wanted to
search too. Seems she was afraid that she wouldnt be someone that I would
like. No matter how this meeting goes, i in the end will KNOW. I can tell
you (like everyone else) that WE ARE ALL AFRAID ....the birthparents, the
adopted child, the adoptive parents. At some point, at least for me, the not
knowing was worse than the fear of rejection. Let it take as long as you
need, and you will know when its the right time to look. In the meantime,
your son could find you instead. I hope you find your peace with this.
janelle collins
--- TBBS v2.1/NM
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* Origin: KinQuest BBS ABQ, NM (1:301/41)
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