JC> What Sondra says is probably true depending on exactly _what_
 JC> comprises "culture". 
 
 SB> The DC is what most of the people in this country tend to believe.  It
 SB> is the culture of the *average Joe* American.
  
 JC> But, I am convinced that the "average Joe American" is also "taught"
 JC> to believe that the "average Joe American" _is_ just that. In other
 JC> words, "someone" (the ubiquitous "they/someone") _says_ that the
 JC> "average Joe American" is _this_. (Again the all-encompassing _this_.
 ) Therefore if and individual who is NOT an "average Joe American" 
_wants_ to
 JC> be "like everyone else" they will _do_ "this". What gets confusing is
 JC> the "how". 
 To me the "how" is the denial of personal accountability of the 
 "why's" of our choices.  By refusing to look at "why" we are
 buying into the "American dream", we can blame the end result
 on "them", not "me".  It really works quite well for everyone
 concerned.  Even for those that perceive themselves as not being 
 a part of the "dream" and want to be.  They refuse to look at 
 "why's" of their choices also and prefer to blame "them". (g)
 JC> achieve that "dream". (Your house _must_ be bigger and better than
 JC> your neighbor's house, your car _must_ be better than your neighbor's
 JC> car, etc.) VALUES. 
 
 The VALUE that I see as missing is the value of self.  A married
 woman who values herself knows that she is a contributing member of
 society even though she doesn't work "outside" of the home, and
 appreciates herself.  A married man whose wife "works" at home 
 values himself if he knows that he is a contributing member of 
 society even though his paycheck alone does not buy all the things
 his "average Joe" neighbor has, and appreciates himself.  
 
 JC> The result is we now have both parents working to
 JC> get the BIG house with the STONE WALL and gates and the
 JC> family/community unit breaks down, etc., etc. 
 
 Community is made up of families, and families of individuals.  If
 the individuals make poor decisions and aren't willing to be
 accountable or even see their accountability, it breeds more of
 the same.
 JC> The "mainstream culture" of America is VERY conservative when it comes
 JC> to "change". 
 
 It *is* difficult to find time for that when we are busy being
 "upwardly mobile".  One must be able to acknowledge the "why" of
 our choices before one can make a choice about changing.
 JC> A classic example came up in the Canadian class the other day in a
 JC> discussion about the metric system. One lady had trouble relating
 JC> kilometers to miles. The prof asked her this question: "How long are
 JC> you in a foreign country before you stop calculating the monetary rate
 JC> of exchange?" In most cases, we decided it wasn't very long. 
 JC> As a result of our "conservatism" (or maybe American's are stubborn
 JC> or "better than"?) we are only one of (maybe) two countries in the
 JC> world that have not adopted the metric system.
 
 How long would it take to get used to it?  A couple of weeks
 perhaps?
 Sondra spoke about our human frailty to, from time to time, be
 unwilling or incapable of examining our belief systems.  The
 same holds true for the belief systems we hammer into place about
 ourselves.  Unless we can look at them, there is no hope for
 change.  If we can't look at an issue inside us, we can't see its
 parallel outside of us either.
 
 
 
  
 
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