* Crossposted from: Fibromyalgia/Fibrositis Discussion Area
ESSAY:  COPING WITH LONG-TERM PAIN BY JUDY
Friday, April 10, 1998
I was diagnosed with CFS in 1988 and Fibromyalgia in 1994.  However, I had
been sick with Fibro for around 10 years prior to the actual diagnoses.
 Before I developed either syndrome, I was a very healthy person.  When I
did get sick, I recovered very quickly.  My coping skills for pain weren't
very good back then.  Once when I had an infected lymph gland behind my
ear, I remember thinking this was the worst and crying with the pain.  Yes,
those do hurt alot.
Now that I've had Fibro and CFS so long, I know that coping with long term
pain is a whole different animal than coping with a pain that you know will
pass when you get to the doctor and get some antibiotic or whatever is
needed.  Long term pain wears you down- physically, emotionally, and
spiritually.  A concentrated effort is needed to cope with unremitting pain
and illness.
Once I decided to take control of my illness, I explored ways to help
myself.  My husband's support and good decision making skills were
invaluable to me.  I suggest that anyone with long term illness and/or pain
seek a person whom they trust to help them sort through the available
medical treatments.  I had several options and also associated problems
that I was too brain fogged to sort through.  My husband, my trusted
advisor helped me put those options and also the other medical problems in
order of priority.  Now two years later, I am still working through the
list.
But Folks, I have to tell you that top of the list should be a trusted
support person.  Then you should deal with what you think about what has
happened to your previously healthy body.  Next, deciding where you are
with your illness and where you want to be is very important.  Making a
conscious effort to adjust your attitude to a more cheerful, hopeful one is
a wonderful help in coping with all this.  Hope is something we all need.
Feeling hopeless and defeated is in effect helping your illness along.
I know that every day we can't be upbeat ( hey, we hurt, we are so darn
tired).  But, if we can establish an upward trend of more hopeful, cheerful
days than defeated ones, then we are on the right track.  Coping with pain
can be very exhausting, not to mention the fatigue that we all have anyway.
For myself, at my worst, some days I could only wash a few glasses or
plates at the sink.  But, I told myself I was proud and thankful that I
could do that much today.  At first, the pep talk didn't work.  Later, to
my surprise, it began to help.  So now everyday, even if I don't get my
list completed I am proud of myself for what I did accomplish.
To wind this all up, I did work my way through several medical treatments.
Some helped enormously, some hardly any.  I am much better now than two
years ago.  For me, the learning to mentally cope with all this is just as
important.  Don't get me wrong, I have down days too.  But mostly, I am
cheerful and I think this helps my pain levels too.  I think in some way a
good mental attitude actually fights against illness and pain.
I hope this helps someone.  This  is just my story of how my life is
different since I've had CFS/Fibromyalgia.
JAK1220@aol.com (Judy)
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   --Bill
     Fidonet Netmail: 1:280/76
     E-Mail: cfsdays@oz.sunflower.org
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