0n (20 Nov 05) Kevin Klement wrote to Cindy Haglund...

 KK> Hi Cindy,

 KK> Friday November 18 2005, Cindy Haglund writes to Kevin Klement:

 >    I'd like to visit.  :) what's the telnet?

 KK> Hay.. Cindy.. I'm back. :)


Good to 'sse' ya!

 KK> Well I don't have a telnet BBS, sorry, the only way to log on to my
 KK> bbs is via POTS, plain old telephone system, but on that point, things
 KK> on the bbs front is quite slow here in calgary, at one time we had
 KK> 100+ bbs's here in calgary, we have only 3 or so active bbs's here
 KK> now. :(

 Aw...

 KK> As far as users of my bbs, I have about 4 active users, thats all. :(

 Hmm...  invite them to Fido? :) here in particular?

 I like a bbs that's easy to navigate. George told me after I whined
about a few I've gone exploring on- some people LIKE complicated menus
where you ahve to wade through tons of other screens to get through to
and then some. Guess so. :) My favorite bbs's don't have that many
active users either on them but we are keeping them alive.

Why one (and favorite sysop (he may be lurking hehehe)- put out on
OBIT in fact. (System problems than a crash then rescue)...
But he came back!!!! So next time he 'goes down' and says its fro goe.
We won't belive him. :) This is btw telnet: holodeck.com

Fun forums and lots of great games. Fido feed too.

 KK> And ALBE_LINK the echo I started, it's pretty much not used any more,
 KK> but 10 years ago, it was busy. As you know fidonet is pretty slow now
 KK> a days,
 KK> internet has pretty much token over.

 Yeah but as long as us die hards are here it lives! Just ignore the
ones trying to kill it and we'll prevail!

I like the 'small town' feel to our Fido echos. (The ones I am in
anyway.)

 > I started bbsing in 1994. I was so new I stupidly mentioned
 > in a local forum (this was before telnet) my hearing loss in
 > hohpe to talk with someone with the same problem. I was new
 > to the problem at that time.
 
 KK> Same thing happened to me, But as time went buy, every one in fidonet
 KK> here in calgary new I was a quadriplegic. Ahhhh.. the good old days
 KK> hu. :)

 Word gets round and then what? You find out, here anyway, it makes no
difference. :) I think the negative reaction I got to revealing my
difference came from those fearing I was going to use it as a.. oh
what is it called. hmm. A defense mechanism? "can't holler at me cuz
I'm disabled!"... heh. Nothing could have been further from the truth.
I didn't want  pity. I just wanted to know if there were others
sshaing the same situation. Even if it doesn't matter, knowing others
epmathize with you (not sympathy mind you but empathy)- somehow makes
being cheerful (positive) about whatever is being discussed easier.
................


 > I got the impression some people just plain freak out if
 > they happen to learn such things. They want you to shut up
 > and go away.... Imagine soiling their pristine perfect
 > little world like that.

 KK> Ya.. most people don't know about my spinal injury, I'm a amiture
 KK> graphic designer (www.gypsy-designs.com) too, and most people find out
 KK> that I have a disability, after the fact of getting me to work for
 KK> them, then all of a sudden it's like, WOW.. I never would have though
 KK> that.


Yeah.. a deaf friend of mine told me about how she had a very good
chat relationship in AIM going until they started talking about music
and ut oh! My friend said, casually that she was deaf. The other
person refused to chat with her again! Just like that!

Should we feel shame or shamed by our diabilities? NO! It's THEIR
problem if they feel uncomfortable around us. We can do just so much.
I mean sh#t, we are the ones with the challenge- but the way SOME
people act- uh you wonder who the challenged person is.

This is what I would like to say to certain deafophobes I am related
to:

Oh gee I'm soOOOOooo sorry my deafness make -YOU- feel uneasy.
Do you ever stop and think about anybody's feelings but your own? And
yeah hate to shock you, but yeah just because a person loses a vital
function doesn't mean tney stop having feelings just like yours!


Thing is with the so called 'abled' persons is: they seem to think
once you stop doing something like hearing, you stop being human!!!
You become an 'untouchable'.

And yeah I just LOVE the LOOK on a newbies face when they learn I'm
deaf. It's like I have the buobonic plague or they get all sympathy
sorry and some will launch into "oh I have a cousin....etc ad nauseum
and and and (you all know better)- start in on the joys of, oh oh
let's call em : cock your ear implants. heh! Oh hey see? I can laugh now!

BTW I read recently that scuh implants (forced upon children btw) so
that the pooooooooooooor abled person won't have to SURFFFERRRRR the
deaf/hoh person's loss: are actually NOT safe to the person they are
implanted into.

BTW I am getting a tad better at lip reading. It's more subconsious
than conscious and i need a lot more practice... sigh.
I do finger spelling and notes. Not full ASL.. (nobody I know wants to
learn it)...  So see it's not like I'm not trying to fit in.

Some deafophobes won't even do email. Emai isn't
"""real"... hehehe...
Boy I'd say they got a disability. Narrow mindedness.

.....................

 KK> Thats because I'm no different than alibied bodied people, 

 >  Sounds wonderful! And everybody can just be themselves
 > without having any hangups about whatever their 'difference'
 > is.

 KK> It was a great place to talk, and meet people, but sadly, that was in
 KK> the past, fidonet has slowed right down. :(

 Yeah.. but wait. We are still here right here! Yes.

 This echo was dead a few months ago btw. George and I helped to bring
it back. :) This, Coffee Klatsch and Dog house.
...........................

 > 'better' people. We're all just people first and last and
 > anybody can be good and anybody can be an asshole. No matter
 > their country, creed, color , gender or whatever.

 KK> Exactly.. if some one piss's me off, I will get mad, just like any one
 KK> else, I'm just as human as the next person, my disability got nothing
 KK> to do with it, treat me good, you get treated back good.

 Nod! It's that Class System Syndrome.. that gives people airs and
dispairs.


 > In High School there was a gal who had lost a front tooth in
 > a softball game. She had a fake tooth. It did not look quite
 > like the rest of her teeth. Some kids would pick on her
 > about it. So you know what this young gal did? :) She's just
 > opern her mouth and flip out that tooh upon her tuongue at
 > the picker oner's... Everyone would have a good laugh. I
 > liked her style.

 KK> Good one.. she's just a human, like all of us, but some people don't
 KK> see that.

 Yep! There's no better way to through insecure/insenstive, immmature
people who make fun of us- off guard than by laughing at ourselves.
YEP I have a fake tooth!

But of course some individuals with disabilities/differences over do
it and make fools out of themselves.

It takes practice to find your center. To be balanced, and then again
some work to stay there. :)

As I have said already, the hardest part of being different isn't the
difference but the attitudes of those make it a difference.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 >  Oh.. I see. I think there are a lot of 'mis spellings' and
 > badly named conditions. Perhaps this will sort itself out
 > one day. Was the word dysfunction?

 KK> Nope, Let me go look it up, it's a medical condition I suffer from.

 Oh okay.. dylexia? I get that a bit in a different way; not the
reading letters backwards but more a spatial relationship sort of
problem. Hard to describe. One example is remembering how to turn a
screw.. Righty tighty, lefty losey. But hehe that is whenyou are
looking righ at it. If you're working on a screw from the other way,
it's the oppoiste. (Getting dizzy here )

Cindy

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