0n (18 Nov 05) Kevin Klement wrote to Cindy Haglund...

 KK> Hi Cindy,

 KK> Friday November 18 2005, Cindy Haglund writes to Kevin Klement:

 > Nor does anyone need to know, especially in cyberspace, but
 > please bear in mind the purpose of this echo; Abled. It's a
 > support group.

 KK> But of corse... I know to well about disabilities Cindy, I've been in
 KK> my chair for over 20 years. And I do understand what this echo is all
 KK> about, I'm a sysop of the Gypsy BBS since 1989. I also formed a local
 KK> echo here in Calgary called ABLE_LINK

   I'd like to visit.  :) what's the telnet?

I started bbsing in 1994. I was so new I stupidly mentioned in a
local forum (this was before telnet) my hearing loss in hohpe to talk
with someone with the same problem. I was new to the problem at that
time. This admission did not go over well at all, much to my shock and
dismay. I'm not sure why but someone took serious offense to my
admission and thought I was looking for sympathy. SO I learned fast
not to mention it in public unless an issue came up where it might be
save to mention it in a way that might not frighten or anger anybody
if you knwo what I mean.

I got the impression some people just plain freak out if they happen
to learn such things. They want you to shut up and go away.... Imagine
soiling their pristine perfect little world like that.


 KK> Able Link is  a  new  local  Calgary  echomail  conference  designed
 KK> to promote  dialog, friendship, and understanding  between able bodied
 KK> and disabled individuals.


 Sounds wonderful! And everybody can just be themselves without having
any hangups about whatever their 'difference' is.


Here's another thing I imagine has come up in your group. You have
probally seen this. Someone posting in FIDO Doghouse brought it up.

A man in a wheelchair had been seen by his neighbor using his dog to
pull the chair... the dog (a young lab) looked emaciated. The owner
had been seen to hit the dog quite a lot. The person posting wondered
if he should call authorities. We all said a very loud YES! Just
becasue the guy is  disabled doesn't give him the right to be an
asshole.

The point being, some people do use their disability to extempt
themselves from what we all consider to be decent behavior.

A shame, bu the truth. There's no such thing as that which some
'normal' people like to thingk: somehow the poor and the lessor well
made are somehow 'better people'. Nobody is 'better' people. We're all
just people first and last and anybody can be good and anybody can be
an asshole. No matter their country, creed, color , gender or
whatever.

I don't know why this opinion above is considered 'idealistic' and
if not  'crazy' by some... perhaps those who want to deny we are all
.. after all. HUMAN first. :(    ?
                                   
 KK> The conference, moderated  by  Kevin  Klement,  will heavily 
 KK> emphasize ABILITIES of the  disabled  and  will  examine  the  special

Sounds what we need more of. And of course in doing so we help each
other find the patience and ability to pursue educating the pubic.
(A real job that.)
                 
 KK>  needs and challenges, both physical and emotional,  that  the
 KK> disabled face today and tomorrow in all aspects of their lives.  Ways


 I have a favorote true story I like to share as it's an inspiration
to all of us who have met up with the challenge of self and other
acceptance of our situation.

In High School there was a gal who had lost a front tooth in a
softball game. She had a fake tooth. It did not look quite like the
rest of her teeth. Some kids would pick on her about it. So you know
what this young gal did? :) She's just opern her mouth and flip out
that tooh upon her tuongue at the picker oner's... Everyone would have
a good laugh. I liked her style.
                                
 KK> in which independence and social acceptance  can be achieved will also
 KK> be  examined  in  this friendly, open environment,  were  all 
 KK> participants,  able  bodied and disabled, can feel at ease asking 
 KK> questions  and  working  together to propose solutions.


 Even being tough with each other I imagine Sometimes it does take
 being tough, to help someone help themselves.

            
 KK> Detailed conference rules will be posted regularly in the conference
 KK> by the moderator, but will not differ drastically from most other
 KK> echomail conferences.

  So you rob us all away from here eh? :)


 > The biggest challenge is attitude. Everybody's.

 KK> Can't agree with you more on that point Cindy.

 Attitude is basically the root of all troubles. Y' know as in: If
someone offends you: do you need to take offense? No.

Then someone asks: but if we don't tell them they offended us how will
they know they were? And correct their behavior. This is tricky. I guess
there are ways to let on you don't approve of their behavior in a tctful
non hostile way. That can be tricky especialy if you're angry. Better to
walk away in that case. (And yeah some pople know they are being rude;
they enjoy it.)


 > If so and so is 'uncomfortable' around someone with a
 > 'difference' and therefor er rejects that person due to
 > their difference:
 > Who has the disability here! Yeah. THEY DO! The 'abled' do.

 KK> I see that every day too, I find the abled community has more problems
 KK> than us people that have mental and physical challenges.

 Yep. Notice how it is when you have a disability yourself you tend to
be more understanding of others who do? Then the non disabled thinks
we need to be like them and want us to be. They can't just let us be
ourselves and focus on what we can do instead.

 > To paraphrase a famous poet, Ella Wheeler Wilcox:
 > ("Solitude")

 > "Laugh and the world laughs with you... weep and you weep
 > alone..." Yeah, alone, even by those who have tried to help
 > you- if you don't stop soon. Bitter cynicism/envy/hate-
 > ultimately alienates even those who would other wise accept
 > us ur 'difference.' Such is the poison one takes waiting for
 > ones foe to die. (I don't know the origin of this last adage
 > but it's a good one! Along with the free thinker's
 > version of the Serenity 'prayer'. :)

 KK> Thank you for that... vcool!


  :) You are welcome. It took me awhile to stop crying when hearing
people would make me feel like I'm not good enough for them. The fact
is, they just can't be better than they are.

>  ................


 > Wrt your 'spelling wrong' disaffection. Not sure what that
 > means but if you are afright from typoitis relax. Speaking

 KK> Nope..  I think we are still on the wrong spelling of the medical
 KK> problem I suffer from, I gotta find the proper spelling and
 KK> definition.

 Oh.. I see. I think there are a lot of 'mis spellings' and badly
named conditions. Perhaps this will sort itself out one day. Was the
word dysfunction?
                  
Cheers, Cindy

... What is mind? No matter! What is matter? Nevermind!

--- PPoint 3.01