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echo: 12_steps
to: EDWARD SOTT
from: J ENDERS
date: 1997-03-13 20:40:00
subject: occured

So It is siad by Edward Sott about something occured to me 
 
 ES> Something just occured to me and set me thinking.  Oft times in AA
 ES> meetings  within my area I hear the following.  "Is anyone having a
 ES> problem staying away from a drink today, a living problem that might
 ES> lead them to a drink, or a  topic they wish do discuss?"  This is a
 ES> very interesting statement to me.  If  I'm not mistaken we all have
 ES> some trial and tribulations while living life on  it's terms.  But just
 ES> becuase there is a little problem I need to clear up  does that mean I
 ES> need to talk about it at an AA meeting?  I really think that  a lot of
 ES> the meetings are loosing the focus.  THe focus is how we got sober, 
 ES> how we stay sober, and how we can help others stay sober.  It's not to
 ES> sit and have a complaint session on what he/she/it did to me today. 
 ES> It's how I'm able to handle things differently as a result of being
 ES> sober that matters.  I've  sit in meetings time and time again hearing
 ES> the same people moan about their  bosses, their families, their wives,
 ES> etc. asking evrybody for feedback.  I  fully beleive that if they wish
 ES> to stay sober do something different.  Admit  they are powerless not
 ES> only over alcohol but everything, find out where they  have the power
 ES> to make a personal change, and use the opportunity presented to do
 ES> exactly that. 
 ES> IF anyone has an opinion on what I've just said feel free.
    I am not going to disagree with what you said it is the truth. I am
simply going to suggest a diffrent reaction to it.
    When I chair the meeting I begin with. "Is anyone having a problem that
may lead them to a drink?"  "Does anyone have a topic they'd like to
discuss?"  The reson that I make two questions out of it and pause
in between them is because I feel that if someone is having a problem that
may lead them to a drink it is more important that they discuss that then if
someone just wants to hear about a topic.
   When I hear the same person talk about the same thing over and over. Some
one with the same problems day after day I get real greatful real quick. I am
growing and there fore do not have the same problems today that I had last
wekk month or year. I donot completely agree on the point of not discussing
problems at meetings though. If something in my life is bothering me to the
point where I want to drink over it then I need to take that to a meeting so
that maybe someone else that is there can give me advise on how they got
through it sober.
   I also belive that if something is bothering me when it is not happening
at that moment I need to work on me. Every time that I start to look at
things that are not happening while I am focusing on them it's because I 
on't
want to focus on something that is going on. In other words I am practicing
avoidance behavior.
JTEnders
... I'd love to, but... I have to study for a blood test.
___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.12
--- GEcho 1.00
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