Hello Rain!
Thursday November 21 1996 16:39, Rain wrote to Bob Jackson:
 R> By the second meeting, I had the shakes so bad I though I was going to
 R> climb out of my skin.  Never having really tried to detox before--I
 R> was in the mental health profession and knew a good deal about
 R> everybody's alcoholism but my own, and an effort to quit would've been
 R> an admission to myself that i was an alcoholic--I had no idea how long
 R> it would last or what to do about it, and was terribly embarrassed by
 R> it. Me, the big professional, shaking so hard she had to sit on her
 R> hands in a roomful of other drunks.
I'm in the same boat, Rain... a medical professional who was too smart and 
too proud to admit or see that I too had the disease... talk about a wakeup 
call!
 R> I really needed, and I mean NEEDED, a cup of coffee.  Problem was, I
 R> couldn't hold it steady enough to drink it without spilling. And then
 R> I had an experience I've since discovered is fairly common: An
 R> old woman with a strong, kind Irish face came over and said, "Here,
 R> let me help."  She put her hands around mine on the cup and fed me the
 R> coffee a sip at a time.
I went straight from a locked down psych unit after detox and was taken to 
"Intensive Outpatient Program", or IOP... and it had been a week since I had 
shaved, (they figured I'd try to _nick_ myself to death ;-), and I was pale 
from the medication and whipped by my own low self esteem.
Upon arrival I was fed, then introduced to this angel who was to be my 
counselor, and welcomed by the simple and understanding eye contact of others 
in the room... and then this angel held me like a baby for a long time... and 
the others surrounded us and joined in quietly and held us... and I knew for 
the first moment that I'd be allright, and that nothing but my own stupidity 
could penetrate such a wall of love that now enfolded me, and in that moment 
I was the prodigal son!
Something wonderful is happening to me ;-)
Bob
bjack@webbsight.com
... If God did not want me to judge myself, why did S/He make me so good at 
it?
--- (c)1996 Ethereal Trade
---------------