Message-ID: 

ItsAllAboutTheGame{at}webtv.net (The Game) wrote:
| I'll never forget the first time I saw James Harris.  James, as many
| of you know, eventually evolved into Kamala "The Ugandan Giant".  It
| was just like yesterday, the city was Cleveland, Mississippi.  I just
| happened to look out the dressing room window, and saw a giant of a man
| crossing the rock covered parking lot, carrying one of those old
| cardboard blue suitcases.  I told the boys, "Check this guy out.  I
| wonder who'll be the lucky one to work with him tonight?" 
| 
| James learned the ropes pretty quick and was given the name of Sugar
| Bear Harris.  "Sugar Bear" got over fairly well, and learned quickly,
| but then he was drafted into my stable of grapplers.  I immediately
| changed his name to "Ugly Bear" Harris.  However, I began to discover
| that he was getting more heat at home than in the arenas.   
| You see, I treated poor "Ugly Bear" pretty badly.  If he lost a
| television match, I sometimes made him bend over and I would plant foot
| on his backside.  One time I even got carried away and slapped his
| face.  The next night, James showed up in the dressing room and asked
| me if we could talk in private.    
| 
| "Percy…" he began, "I just don't know how much more I can
take."  I
| asked him to explain, "You see, I knows what we do ain't for real, but
| my wife don't.  Every time you do something bad to me on TV, when I
| gets home, she be waiting on me on the front porch with a shot gun." 
| Now keep in mind, this was the mid-70's in rural Mississippi. 

LOL!

| James
| continued, "Last night, after she saw you slap my face, she chased me
| across the street into the lumberyard, and Percy I had to stay out there
| all damn night!  Please lets try something different this week, so we
| can keep her and her friends happy." 
| 
| So, I eased up on 'ol "Ugly Bear" for a while, but then came the night
| of the big TV Battle Royal.  The winner would receive $5000! 
| Mephisto made the decision to put James over.  But James knew what
| would be waiting on him when he got home.  
| 
| As he pulled into his muddy driveway, there she was, with all her
| friends.  It was party time, hell after all; her husband had just won
| $5000, by beating up 12 men.  ""Let me see it James."  Ugly Bear's
| wife commanded,  "The $5000 you won on TV, I want to see it!"  
| Stuttering like Mel Tillis, James tried to tell her he didn't get any
| money.  Well boys…  it was back across the street to the
| lumberyard, to spend another cold wet night!  Needless to say, the
| next morning, I believe Mr. James Harris finally decided it was time for
| Mrs. James Harris to get smartened up, if you will.
 
I miss the days of kayfabe.  I'm still trying to decide if I should
keep kayfabing my nephews or "smarten them up".

         SPAMguard: add a dash between "Hack" and "Man"
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