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overhanging rock and was killed instantly when it fell on him.
18.  Three men attempting to steal copper wire off live electrical lines
for resale were electrocuted.  Copper wiring is a valuable scrap metal in
Texas but is usually stolen from electric cables not being used.
AND THE WINNER:
John Pernicky and friend Sal Hawkins, of the great state of Washington,
decided to attend a local Metallica concert at the Amphitheater at Gorge,
Washington.  Having no tickets (but 18 beers among them) they sat in the
parking lot, and after finishing the beer, decided that it would be easy
enough to hop over the nine-foot high fence and sneak into the show.  The
two friends pulled their pickup truck over to the fence and the plan was
for John-100 pounds heavier than Sal--to hop over, and then assist his
friend over the fence.  Unfortunately for John, there was a 30 foot drop
on the other side of the fence.  Having heaved himself over, he found
himself crashing through a tree.  His fall was abruptly halted by a large
branch which snagged him by his shorts.  Dangling from the tree, with one
arm broken, John looked down and saw a group of bushes below him.
Figuring the bushes would break his fall, John removed his pocket knife
and proceeded to cut away his shorts to free himself from the tree.  When
finally free, John crashed below into Holly bushes.  The sharp leaves
scratched his entire body and now being without his shorts, he was the
unwilling victim of a holly branch penetrating his rectal cavity.  To make
matters worse, his pocket knife proceeded to fall with him and landed
three inches into his left thigh.  Seeing his friend in considerable pain
and agony, Sal decided to throw him a rope and pull him to safety.
However, weighing about 100 pounds less, he decided the best course of
action would be to tie the rope to the pickup truck.  This is when things
went from bad to worse.  In his drunken state, Sal put the truck into the
wrong gear, pressed on the gas, and crashed through the fence, drops 30
feet landing on and killing his friend.  Sal was thrown from the truck,
suffered massive internal injuries and also died at the scene.  Police
arrived to find a pickup truck with its driver thrown 100 feet from the
vehicle and upon moving the truck, a half naked man, with numerous
scratches, a holly stick up his rectum, a knife in his thigh, and a pair
of shorts dangling from the tree branches 25 feet in the air.
Honourable mention: Two local men were seriously injured when there pickup
truck left the road and struck a tree.  The accident occurred as the two
men were returning to Des Arc after a frog gigging trip.  On an overcast
Sunday night, the pick-up truck headlights malfunctioned.  The two men
concluded that the headlight fuse on the older model truck had burned,out.
As a replacement fuse was not available, the passenger noticed that a .22
caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fusebox next to the
steering wheel column.  Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again
began to operate properly.  After traveling approximately 2 miles and just
before crossing a bridge, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged and
struck the driver in the right testicle.  The vehicle swerved sharply to
the right exiting the pavement and striking a tree.  The driver suffered
only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will require surgery
to repair the other wound.  The passenger sustained a broken clavicle.
Afte r being released he stated, "Thank God we weren't on that bridge when
Thurston shot his nuts off or we might both be dead."
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... The OFFICIAL tagline of the 1996 Olympics!
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