George,

 GP> Just heard this about Outback Steakhouses in Texas: If you go into
 GP> Outback Steakhouse in Texas & order anything but a steak, they  take
 GP> you "out back."  (ouch!)

  Never mind wanting the bloomin' onion. :P

  That reminds me of the joke where this guy walks into a bar, and there
is this rather calm bull, just laying on the floor. There is a huge jar
of money on the counter, and the customer asks the bartender what's going
on. The bartender says "It costs you $5 to enter the drawing...if you make
the bull laugh, you win all the  money". 

  So, the customer pays his $5, goes over to the bull, and whispers
something in his ear. The bull starts laughing uncontrollably...like 
when you've heard a hilarous joke. The bartender says "Well, it looks
like you're the winner"...and he gives him the jar full of money.

  The following week, he goes back in there, and there's the bull, as
calm as ever...and another jar full of money. Again, the customer asks
him what's going on, and the bartender says "It's a new contest...this
time, you have to make the bull cry". So, the guy pays his $5, and asks
the bartender if he can take the bull to the bathroom. Apprehensive, the
bartender says "You're not going to hurt him??", and is told "Of course
not". So, he takes the bull in the bathroom, and moments later, he and
the bull come out, and the bull is sobbing like his favorite heifer had
died.

  The bartender says "Well, it looks like you win again. But, before I
let you have the money...would you mind telling me how you won??".

  The customer smiled, and said "First, I told the bull I had a bigger
pecker than he did...then, I proved it". 

 GP> At the farmer's market; my fave booth's owner gave mea fresh pod of
 GP> English  peas -- too fibrous for me -- I prefer the garden peas , raw
 GP> in pods -- nice &  sweet & when I chew it, it disintegrates, unlike the
 GP> English variety, when I'm  left with a wad of gum that's seemingly made
 GP> of sisal.

  I forgot to get a deal like that for a casserole the other day, as I was
limited on funds, and wanted to get good deals. So, I got these 3 minute
pizzas, bags of chicken nuggets, lunch meat, single cheese slices, and
ketchup. It still cost $75, but with bonus fuel points, and filling out a
survey, I'll have 20 cents a gallon off the next time I have to get gas for
the car. The other day, at $4.20 a gallon (mid-grade), it took $46 to fill
up the car. It'll probably be above $5 a gallon the next time I fill up.
I saw a meme that noted "I got gas for 99 cents, but it was at Taco Bell".


 GP> Of course. & then if they do accidentally cure the one thing, they
 GP> generate  another health problem that they're conveniently about to
 GP> release a new drug  for. . .

  Yep. A cured patient is a lost customer, according to Big Pharma.

 GP> Pissing you off? Or feeling like you've grabbed holt of a
 GP> rhymes-with-Venus?

  I thought I'd lose mine after all that Lasix in water the last time
I was in the hospital after bladder stone surgery.

Daryl

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