> Doctor: Do you do any exercise??
> Patient: Like what??
> Doctor: Bend down and touch your toes.
> Patient: If God had wanted me to touch my toes, He would've put them on my
> knees. 

Doctor: if God wanted you to be so obese your heart's about to explodce, He've  designed the body's digestive processes better to not be so efficient with you  giving it a proper healthy diet.

>> Did you hear about the little native American boy who drank a gallon of
>> sweet  tea before bed? They found him the next morning, drowned in his
>> own teepee.
> I guess he wanted to keep his wigwam.

The neighbours are fighting?
  What happened?
Mrs O'Leary asked Mrs. McGillicuddy what does she do to provide a urine sample  for the laboratory, & Mrs. M stold her to p*** in a cup, them Mrs. O told her  to sh** in her hat & fight was on!
  Why you telling me?
I want pocorn, but I don't want ot miss anything; would you be a dear a  microwave one of those packets for me, please?

>> I showed up over dressed to a family member's party and my aunt spilled
>> sweet  tea all over my dress shirt. She solved my clothing problem Aunt
>> Jay: I'm so sorry I ruined your nice shirt! Me: You didn't ruin it, you
>> turned it into a tea-shirt for me!
> Tea-riffic.

Not Tie-dye, but tea-dye!

>> Any time my brother or I order Sweet Tea at a restaurant, my dad says
>> "Did you  just call the waitress Sweetie?"
> Really.

As rumoured -- good dad joke, though. . .

from parade.com

Which bear is the most condescending? A pan-duh! What kind of noise does a witchÆs vehicle make? Brrrroooom, brrroooom. WhatÆs brown and sticky? A stick.
Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked. How do you get a country girlÆs attention? A tractor. Why are elevator jokes so classic and good? They work on many levels. What do you call a pudgy psychic? A four-chin teller. What did the police officer say to his belly-button? YouÆre under a vest. What do you call it when a group of apes starts a company? Monkey business. My wife asked me to stop singing ôWonderwallö to her. I said maybeà

--- BBBS/Li6 v4.10 Toy-5