George,

 GP> You'll find our fees listed as from "Services Rendered Uninc."

  Every business has that now.

 >> Thankfully it's been a while since I've called 911 & needed an
 >> ambulance --  it's a pain in the benchwarmer!
 > There's a new vehicle called the flatulance. It picks you up after you
 > have been run over by a steamroller. 

 GP> & the wahmbulance that comes when you've been whining (or whinging, but
 GP> not wining or winning)

  Sounds like what the liberals today are.

 GP> *vocalizing* "wah-ahhh wahhh-ah wah-ahhh"

  Better get that diaper changed 

 GP> Yup; I used to get my emnail & newsghroups via a DOS-like menu at a

  Tha late Nancy Backus, who lost her battle to stomach cancer last year,
was a prolific user in the FIDONet echoes...but she used a DOS application
for her QWK Mail right up to the very end. I never got to meet her, but the
fondest memory I have of her was that when I posted the tagline "I took an
IQ test, and the results were negative"...she replied "That explains a lot
". Later, she said she hoped I wasn't offended by that...and I said
"I actually got a good laugh out of it". She is sorely missed.

 GP> Generally got 1-3 a week or more when one virus was particularly
 GP> rampant on PCs of my generation.

  I don't think I've ever been hit by one...now, I probably just jinxed
myself. :P But, I just updated the latest version of IObit Malware Fighter
yesterday...it has an anti-virus, bit defender anti-virus, anti-malware,
and anti-ransomware data engine.

 GP> I update definitions daily (some are that new) & run full heuristics
 GP> scan daily on all RW drives, too.

  My IObit programs (as long as the yearly registration is current) do the
updates automatically, and I also have it set for real time protection and
scanning. There have been a few false positives, but that has been rare.

 GP> Cyberpope  does NOT spread worms

  Unless they're in your stool. :P

 > Or we're dumb enough to keep shelling out big bucks for their stuff.

 GP> Who says I do?

  At least you and I aren't trying to "keep up with the Jones's".

 GP>   "Because I'm dying for a f***ing cigarette!"

  A different kind of "smokin'".  Your sister had a baby, but we don't know if it's a boy or girl, so
 > I don't know whether you're an aunt or an uncle.

 GP> How can they know, when the baby's not old enoug to talk & TELL them?!

  It's like the one of the guy who was given a present of this bird who
spoke 10 languages. He told the giver it was delicious...and when the
giver told him that, the guy replied "He didn't say a word about that to
me". 

 GP> This is why DC is so scared of Canadians; we speak two languages & we
 GP> understand metric well enough to use iutr daily! (& most of us can do
 GP> Imperial, too).

  And yet, amateur radio and meteorology use metric...in the band names
(wavelengths) and temperatures. The HF bands are defined from 10 meters
on down to 160 meters...the VHF bands and 6 meters, 2 meters, and 1.25
meters...and the UHF bands are 70 centimeters on up.

  In weather, temperatures are in Celsius, pressures are in millbars or
hectopascals, and likely several others that escape me right now.

  Or, you could be like the guy who had this on his wall in winter.

0
B.A.
B.S.
J.D.

  It was known as three degrees below zero. 

 GP> I like Crown Royal (12year blended rye whiskey), & we had RC Cola in
 GP> the '70s  until Pepsi bought it up here & killed the brand (it was my
 GP> fave pop by far, as 1 in 5 were winners, but I won more like 2-3 in 6!)

  I hardly ever see RC Cola or 7-up anymore.

 GP> At 18, she was pure cheesecake; at 48, she was more like sour cream.

 GP> A real man loves her no less at 48. . .

  They say age shouldn't matter...to me, it does if you're into pedophilia.
There are too many perverts and sex offenders nowadays (and one thought 
that Sodom and Gomorrah were bad).

 GP> My fave quote from "Married With Children"

  A friend of mine watched that...I never cared for it.

Daryl

... "I was married by a judge. I should've asked for a jury." -Groucho
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