> Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a
 > lot of heat and excitement?"
 > Harry: "Firetruck."

 > The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry
 > in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong......

Me, too, Mr. Principal, me, too!

A nun was on an airplane, on a flight to Rome, as she was being transferred to
the Vatican for her constant piety and purity.

To keep occupied, she was doing crosswords.  She tapped the gentleman ahead of
her on the shoulder to ask, "What's a 4 letter word for 'woman' that ends in U-
N-T?"

He ponfders for a moment and answers, "AUNT, sister."

She ponders a second before asking him, "Do you have an eraser I may borrow,
please?"

DISCLAIMER: I've met some really nice nuns! Committed women; committed to doing
God's work even if their calling shuld lead them to live as Mother Teresa.

I offered them water on a hot day when they were visiting & they refused saying
their order has a rule to nevert accept anbything from another's home, because
waster mat be freely available here, but in India someone could offer water
even if it was water they needed to survive.

Can't argue with nor criticize that kind of self-control & motivaton. . .

Lovely ladies, indeed.  I blessed them as tyhey were starting out on a 5-mile
walk(they never used Transit nor cars--also an Order law) to their next
destination, carrying heavy wool blankets to give to those with AIDS, who feel
the chills more than uninfected people do.

I joke about the Catholic religion, but I don't mean any of it. . .

for those in it who are not sincere, I leave that up to God & His Spirit to
correct+teach them.

but their idiosycracies & stereotypes do make for good humour fodder,. all in
good fun, of course!

Q: What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
A: Virgin mobile.

Q: What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A: A Roamin' Catholic

I’m addicted to abusing nuns, I just can’t not hit them, the only thing that’s
worked for me is redirecting it to somebody else.
I’m trying really hard to kick the abbot

&, in case there are Catholics reading this, a bit from the other side:

Most protestants are dog people
...they don't like cat licks.

A priest, A Baptist minister, and a rabbit go into a red cross to donate blood.
The nurse asks "What is your blood type"?
The rabbit says "I think I'm a type O"

I drove by two First Baptist Churches today.
One of them is lying

A son asks his father for a new car for his birthday...
Son: Dad, I turn 16 in a few months and would really like a car for my
birthday.

Father: Well son, I’ll make a deal with you. If you do three things for me,
I’ll get you the car. First, you need to improve your grades. Second, I want
you to see you in church every Sunday. And finally, I want you to cut your long
hair.

A FEW MONTHS PASS

Son: Dad, next week is my birthday and I’ve done everything you asked. Can I
get a car?

Father: I did notice you got straight A’s on your report card and I’ve seen you
at church every Sunday. But you didn’t cut you hair. I told you to cut your
hair.

Son: I wanted to talk to you about that. In bible study I learned that Moses,
John the Baptist, and Jesus all had long hair.

Father: Yes they did. And they walked everywhere they went.

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
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