>   There was a study awhile back, that determined that "humans fart from
 > as little as 15 times a day, to as much as 20 times an hour". I wonder
 > how much of our tax money went toward that?? Then, they were going to do
 > a study on second hand flatulence, but they couldn't get any volunteers
 > to step up for the smell test. :P

It may not have been government-sponsored; quite possible someone like P&G
commissioned it to see if a fart deoderant would have enough of a market.

 >   The cartoon comes to mind, where this guy is in the hospital bed, with
 > his head all bandaged up. The physician walks in, with this huge glass
 > jar, full of musical notes in it, and the jar is sealed up tight. The
 > surgeon says "Good news, Mister Smith!! We got rid of that tune that
 > was stuck in your head!!". 

I thought of the one where the guy was in a coma for 20+ years.  Finally his
wife brings in an old boombox & plays her old New Kids on the Block cassette;
he woke up to say, "turn that  off!"

 >   Then there was another joke about the guy being able to fart the
 > national anthem...his rendition really stunk.

There really was a guy who could do that. He was on stage, so I doubt they 
had reactions to the smell (these people have the ability to suck up air into
the anus, so it's not old stale product of fermentation comining out, thus
barely any, if any, smell. . .

One guy could reverse-suck water up into himself then put out a fire from 2
feet away!

I use the trash talk, "If you're not careful, I'm going to reverse introduce
this(anything) to your digestive processes"

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
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