> 1) Alleluia
 > 2) The Seven Last Words Of David
 > 3) The Peaceable Kingdom

 >   I believe #2 is done with piano accompaniment, but #1 and #3 are done
 > a cappella (no accompaniment). The most dreaded words on a choral work are
 > in the piano accompaniment part..."For Rehearsal Only". 

Why would that be a cause for dread?

I used to sing solo in church (so low nobody could hear me!)

 
 >   This preacher went to visit the home of an elderly lady, who was a long
 > time organist at the church. As she went to get them some refreshments, he
 > noticed a bowl of water on the organ, with a condom in it. The preacher 
was
 > obviously embarrassed, and he finally got up the courage to ask her what
 > this meant.

 >   The woman replied "I was taking a walk recently, and I found this 
package
 > on the ground. It said "put on organ, keep wet, helps prevent disease.
 > Preacher, I haven't been sick in ages!!".

 >   The preacher fainted dead away. 

Another preacer webnt to see an old lady after services, before lunch.

At her home, he sday in the offered chair & noted a bowl of almonds on the
table beside him, being a tad peckish, he asked if he could nibble on them as
they talked.  She allowed it, & he proceeded with his welfare check visit,
listening as she told him of her family & heath troubles.

When it was time to go he noted he'd some hw eaten EVERY almond.  Feeling 
bad, he apologized for losing control.

She chuckled & said, "No worries, sonny. I'm too old to chew those big nuts 
so I just suck the chocolate offa them."

 >   Hemophilia is a very serious condition. They've asked me if I'm on
 > blood thinners, or if I'm dehydrated. I drink a half gallon of diet
 > green tea citrus a day, so my kidneys and bladder are in overdrive.
 > But, I haven't had a kidney stone since I quit drinking carbonated
 > beverages, soda, etc.

I've had kidnery stones yearly since 1990 wqhen I became half paralyzed. 

I drink about 1 can of Coke every 6 months, & only when I need to quickly 
wake up for work or other activity requiring me to be wider awake than I am.

Biggest was 25ml; worst was about 6 weeks one sumer, I passed 5-10 pea-sized
stones a DAY!!! (I learned -- no more EmergenC immunity-boosting mineral
drinks

 >   Sounds like when the scientist at the urology lab made a new medical
 > discovery, he yelled "Eurethra!!".

Kelly Bundy exclaimed once, "Urethra! I have found it!"

Did you know when you are born, you have 4 kidneys?
When you grow up, two of them become adult knees.

My teacher was teaching us about the Urinary System...
Just before he started he said :
"Urine for a treat!"

I replied with:
"You gotta be kidneying me!"

England doesn’t have a kidney bank
But it does have a Liverpool.

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
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