> George,

 >  >   Keep me abreast on things from Dolly Parton and Morganna. 

 >  GP> Polly Darton, I'll always remember them -- but who is Morganna?

 >   She was known as "The Kissing Bandit", and was rather "well endowed". :P

 >  GP> Seinfeld asks, "If he's the Best Man, why is she marrying HIM!"

 >   Really. In a nudist wedding, you can tell who the best man is. 

Not necessarily the man she's marrying. . .

They don't need to be nude to find out who's the largest. He's the one who
doesn't say, "Size isn't important.  Women prefer other things about a man."

Or, "It's not the size o the bot, it's the motion in the ocean that counts."

 >  GP> I love Vidalia dressing at Subway. . .

 >   Will have to try that sometime.

They have it off & on -- Costco has a good sweet onion dressing, but you need
to buy 2 one-gallon jugs at a time!

 >  GP> Right -- the doctor's job is to inform the patient directly! Unlessd
 >  GP> the doc was paying your wife to translate. .

 >   Not that I know of.

There you go -- the doc is to tell his patient. I communicate well with my 
GP. as she knows I know enough medical jargon she doesn't need to "dumb it
down" for me.  Same with my dentist -- even with my son the dentist knows not
to simplify terms!

 >   Years ago, several ladies who I square danced with, were nurses on my 
ward
 > in the hospital. I got a ton of grief, and chain pulling. 

That sounds like it was fun! I like when nurses are human/real. . .

When I was 19, I was getting IVs  4 times a day & an injection 6X day (awake
or not).

One time, at the 6 hour mark, I was to get my IV swapped out & the Heperon
Lock flushed, but the nursesd werre doing shift change,m s I just went ahead 
& did it exacyly as I'd seenb them do it a dozen t imes already.

When the new shift'sd nurse came over she was 'mad' at me, while smiling &
winking, especially when she saw how professional the job I did was.

She requested nicely, so I didn't do it again.

These nursese weere greast -- the food suicked (big surprise!) & I'd be up at
2am, wandering in the hall, & I'd snell good stuff from t he nursing station
-- as they'd oprder in at night, & then took to inviting me in to share the
yummy outside food with them.  Good times. . .

I always make friends with my nurses, as I seek not to be a problem patient,
but I will be assertive in my actual needs.

I failed my medical school entrance exam last week, thanks to nerves.
The correct answer was blood vessels.

Why are so many medical examiners hired on January 1st?
It's always, "New Year, new ME"

Q: What do fish do when they need medical attention?
A: Sea kelp

I went to the library to get a medical book on abdominal pain.
Somebody had ripped the appendix out.

I asked my boss if he would donate to my organization that provides medical
support to Asian children with terminal diseases so they don’t have to be put
down.
  He hasn’t responded yet, but when he does I’ll find out if he supports 
  youth in Asia.

My friend is a medical professional who does circumcisions for a living.
He doesn't get paid much, but at least he gets to keep all the tips.

A warden implemented a policy to only allow medical assistance to inmates 
that previously cooperated
  They called it "Snitches get stitches"

I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency...
I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions.

True story: we bought our son, when he was 8, a genuine medical student grade
(interns buy the same one) stethescope.  He checked on our dog's heart
condition. (good)

Tesla just started production of medical gear to support hospital workers...
The Elon Mask is their first product.

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
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