>  GP> Ditto for a bra., but I think the 80-year-old women might have no
 >  GP> choice, as that's where the twins have decided to move to. . .

 >   Keep me abreast on things from Dolly Parton and Morganna. 

Polly Darton, I'll always remember them -- but who is Morganna?

 >   He is right, though. He also noted "If the #2 pencil is so popular, WHY 
is
 > it STILL #2??".

& there's never been a good answerto that one yet!

Seinfeld asks, "If he's the Best Man, why is she marrying HIM!"

 >   I prefer the sweet onions (Vidalias). I can't handle the hot ones. The
 > diet green tea I drink quite a bit of is a good source of Vitamin C and
 > antioxidants. I saw a commercial for Pedigree pet food, and this little
 > weiner dog says "Oh!! Antioxidants help me stay healthy!! I thought you
 > said 'anti-dachshunds'". 

The Spanish onions are best in medicinal soups or teas, I find.

I love Vidalia dressing at Subway. . .

 >   My late wife had gone with a neighbor (who never graduated elementary
 > school), to her doctor...and after the doctor told her neighbor what was
 > going on, my wife asked her "Did you understand that??". When she replied
 > "No", my wife growled "Ok, Doc, I understood it, but she didn't it. Would
 > you mind saying it again in layman's terms??".

Right -- the doctor's job is to inform the patient directly! Unlessd the doc
was paying your wife to translate. . 

Guy went to see his doc & after a 3-hour exam & tests, said, "Give it to me
straight, dc, what's wrong with me? & don't use fancy civilian terms -- tell
it to me straight."

Doc: "You're darn lazy!"
Man: "Perfect; now give it to me in medical terms so I can tell my wife!"

I thought about that one for year, finaly coming up with the medical term:

MD(H)D (Motivational Deficit Disorder (with Hypoactivity))

Yyjhere was this duburban dad trying to put together a big outdoor toy for 
his son, but he could't decipher the instructions, even with the hand-drawn
pictures of mutant dinosaurs that were intended to make it easier.

His old (88yo) neighbour, possibly Wilson, says he can help.

Gratefuly, the tyoung dad accepts.


Wilson comes over & hasd it put togeher & working in 5 minutes.

Dad asksd how; Wilson says, "Never learned how to read, so had to learn to
think for myself instead."

 >  GP> I then realized I had a lot of power, even with no medical degree. . 
.

 >   Mine are Fahrenheint, Celsius, and Kelvin, below the numeric goose 
egg...
 > 3 degrees below zero. 

Yup:

X-X*1
------------
PhD, MA, BSc


 >  GP> Nurse: Hi patient, I’m nurse

 >   Never mind taking a turn for the nurse.

They frown on that, in spite of what Penthouse Letters might have said.

I flirted, though, & had my fun. . .

Got my main nurse one day; I went uyp tothe desk to tell her "Latetly
everything I eat goes straight to my stomach."

She heads to the doctor booking clipboard & starts writing; I ask her what
she's doing (making you an appt to see the doctor.) why? She repeats what I
said & I repeat it back slowly, until she got it & growled & grinned.

To my wife I can speak of a problem of post-somnolent tumescence; she's
trained in medical terminology & would understand completely & tell me good
luck with it. . ,

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
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