>   I was born a male (no choice in that), but I'm a GENTLEMAN by choice. 

I'm quite content being a man, & I, too, choose being a gentleman.

 >   Forty-five years ago, I was riding the school bus, and the kids wanted 
to
 > be late for school. So, they put a board chock full of nails, spikes, 
etc.,
 > under the right front tire. They figured if they got a flat tire, they'd 
be
 > 2 hours or more late for school.

 >   Well "The Still Small Voice of The Lord" told me to look under the tire
 > (I was usually the last one to board the bus, anyway), and I removed it,
 > putting it in the nearby trash pile, nails down, so someone wouldn't step
 > on it, and puncture their foot, and get hepatitis. The girls yelled "Daryl
 > sucks possum pussy!!"...you can imagine what they're saying today.

Any t imesomeone hit me with such a weird random insult, I trierd to flip it
back like:

"You always look like you live it so much, I had to try it; what's the
matter, honey, did I take your last one?"
OR, if I really want to slam the brakes on it:
"I didn't know your nickname was possum!"
OR, keeping it simple:
"I swear, I thought it was chicken"

 >  GP> He grew up in the '50s, when you at least tried to respect the 
sweeter
 >  GP> sex. . . (& elders, & government leaders, & cops, & teachers)

 >   I was raised that way as well.

My dad was always respectful to my mom & to us. One thing I'm most grateful
for is never having heard the Lord's Name misused (as a swear word) in my
childhood home.

 
 >   On the ham radio traffic nets that I do, I address the men as "sir", and
 > the women as "Ma'am". When asked why, I said "Respect. If I give it, I 
know
 > they'll return it".

That's not always true, but you gottsa be you & do what's right regardless,
eh?

I do love how it's a US South thing to always address all people with Sir or
Maam.  I use it, even though I never grew up with it as a background.

Problem is these old women who are in denial who say, "Maam? I'm too young 
for Maam!"; I don't reply, "I'm sorry, Maam, but there's nothing older than
Maam for a term." nor, "Sorry, Maam, just because you started making babies 
at age 12 doesn't mean you're young forever, Maam!"; I get to think them,
though!

 >  GP> Now I'm the old curmudgeon, at only 54! *LOL*  Oh well, I stand by my
 >  GP> principles, & if you don't ike these principles, I've got others. . .

 >   I'm 61, but compared to some folks, we're still puppies. But, I dare say
 > we are both weaned and toilet trained.  I think of the meme where Daddy
 > is trying to feed his son from the milk bottle...but Junior wants the 
fresh
 > variety...from Momma's breasts. Weren't we talking about this the other
 > day?? Or was this in another echo, and from someone else??

Not me; you know it -- we picked up the key lessons & run with them. . .

Most of my frioends from age 6 onward, til now were 20+ years older than me.
My peer group had no lived experience worth learning from! I was an avid
resder, so I traveled the world, having new adventures daily. . .

 >   What card and other games I play are on the BBS. One time, I went from
 > Little Rock to St. Louis, to use up some flight miles on Southwest 
Airlines.
 > I took their Metrolink light rail to East St. Louis, and walked down to 
the
 > Delta Queen cruise ship, permanently moored on the Illinois side of the
 > Mississippi River. I went in, spent $1 in the casino, but hit the jackpot
 > on a $4 all you can eat breakfast buffet.

That how Jon Pinette does it, he said, back when he was alive & performing
some of the best clean standup you've ever heard. . .
 
 >   I did that when my wife and I were married...but she didn't want kids...
 > noting "they wouldn't spay me, so he volunteered to get neutered". But,
 > after severe chicken pox 41 years ago that nearly went into encephalitis
 > (I was hospitalized for a week, and quarantined at home for 2 months),
 > then working around and absorbing nasty solvents in silkscreen printing
 > for nearly 20 years, I felt it was better "I get my wings clipped". We
 > told folks that "We have a son...a dachshund"...who was truly an S.O.B.;
 > and he acted like one, too!! 

They key is to be on the saame page ("not be be unevenly yoked").

Opposites attract; I'm a guy, she's a gal - that's all the oposite we need in
our marriage!

 >   One day, we were otherwise "intimately occupied" on the Futon, and the
 > dachshund was in his bed next to it. All of a sudden, this horrible stench
 > permeated our nostrils...the dog had dropped an SBD methane fart bomb!! I
 > started gagging, and my wife was laughing uncontrollably...saying "You 
know
 > he's down there, going 'Hee hee hee!! Ignore my @$$, will you??!!". So, 
any
 > love making went out the window and down the toilet. I had to get dressed,
 > and take the fur head out for a walk. 

Gotta love our little fur babies. .oh, yeah a canine "cry for help from a 
turd in trouble" cannot be ignored, no matter what'd you might rather be
doing.

 >  GP> We divided up chores easily enough. I can't do certain things like
 >  GP> dishes, so they do those.  Can't do laundry either & in this
 >  GP> non-accessible unit, can't much cook, but her offer was if I provide
 >  GP> the stuff she wants for the kitchen, laundry, & preferred diapers,
 >  GP> she'll happily take care of those chores. . .  SOLD!

 >   Just like the song done by John Michael Montgomery...and the female in
 > that video is a cute one. :)

Don't know this reference.  ?

 >   Janice was actively engaged in all my hobbies, especially the BBS. But,
 > in the doorgames, while she was a great winner, she was a sore loser. 
 > Yet, even with her poor eyesight, she found typos that I missed!!

My wife & I are evenly matched enough in Scrabble & Trivia (our fave
competitive games) & neither worries whomever wins or loses. . .

She's got the bad eyes, too, &, like yours, catches my typoes & insists I fix
them (normally, if informal, & they can be deciphered by most, I leave them,
as I think it's cheating to go back & change what I've 'said.'

 >   Janice also noted "You can't be stolen, if you don't want to be stolen".
 > Like the country song noted "I've got all the love a man could want, 
waiting
 > for me at home".

She made a god point.  No brteakup ois one person's fault.

Yes, cheating is prettyy ultimate, but one might wonder WHY did the other 
feel the need to?

Still wrong, of course; I gave my word & I keep my word.  Period.

 
 >  GP> Battered women? & all this time I've been eating them raw!

 >   

Worse tha possums?

 >  GP> I was dating a communist recently
 >  GP> It was a horrible relationship, all the red flags were there.

 >   I would say so...they were Russian to air their dirty laundry.

3 people at a port-a-potty.  One inside, one leaving, one heading towards it'
what are their nationalities?

Inside: European
going towards: Russian
Leaving: Finnish.

 >  GP> I might be dating myself by admitting this...
 >  GP> but since the 80s, I've only gone to the movies alone.

 >   Well, you take yourself to the movies...or to the ballgame.

Not me -- no inrterest in going to those; if I et free tix, as I do
occasionally, I might grab a mate & go to a game (usually best seats, like
50yd line, bottom tier, for football)

Q: Why was Cinderella terrible at football?
A: Because she kept running away from the ball, and her coach was a pumpkin!

Did you hear about the octopus that played football?
He had ten-tackles!

True story, I learned this week, the Super Bowl is named for the bouncy 
rubber ball (super ball) we had as a kid!

Q: Why is it always so drafty in football stadiums?
A: Because of all the fans. (yes, this was written pre-covid & outside of
{stadium of most hated team})

Q: What would William Perry’s nickname be, if he played for the LV Raiders?
A: Fridgerator Raider

Ok, they canb't get worse rhan that, so I'll stop here. . . :D 

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
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