George,

 > until I was 43...but never dreamed I'd be a widower at 47.

 GP> For real?! Ouch! :(

  Yep...and I never remarried. But, I'm glad my parents and wife are gone
now, so they wouldn't see me suffer.

 GP> I married at 42 (late enough); first time dad at 44. . . It's a young
 GP> man's game, but I'm surviving it. . . :)

  Getting married should scare the crap out of a man. It did me, literally...
I had IBS the morning before we went to my wife's church to the ceremony. Her
church had a potluck every other Sunday, and that's when we got married. We
walked in, and were greeted with "Ah!! The Bride And Groom!!"...to which, I
said, "We're not married yet". 

  I want to backtrack a little though...to the bridal shower a month before.
My fiance' (I used to think it was pronounced "finance-ee". ) wanted
everyone there...not just the ladies.

  The funniest part was where they were giving the new couple to be, advice;
but no one would sign their names. Here are the top 3:

3) "Janice shouldn't be the only one with dish pan hands". 

  After working at Burger King for 5 years over 40 years ago, I was no
stranger to doing dishes, taking out trash, etc. I've had to do such since
her death...and have no sympathy for husbands who say "housework is for the
woman".

2) "Daryl...pray for the Second Coming (of The Lord Jesus Christ). Jan...
pray that it is soon". 

  I had thought of myself as a Life Member of BTR (Bachelor 'Til Rapture);
but The Good Lord made a liar out of me on that...and I got voted out. 

1) "Violets are Purple. Roses are Red. When Daryl is blue...Jan, head for
the bed".

  The preacher's wife (a natural blonde, but smarter than one), and
myself, turned the color of a tomato. I uttered the S word in an
expletive as I put my head down on the table. No one heard it, as
the entire room had erupted into raucous laughter. Janice said "Oh!!
He's turning a much brighter shade of pink than he normally does!!".
I was *NEVER* so embarrassed in all my life!!

  But, at the wedding, I was so nervous, that I put her engagement
ring (that we got for $25 at a Going Out Of Business Sale from an 
area K-Mart store (I think all of them are gone now)...her wedding
ring...and my wedding ring, all on her finger. 

  I'm about to blurt out "Where the Hell is the other one??!!"
The Good Lord is so wise..the preacher gently admonished (and
everyone heard it) "You're not supposed to put all the rings
on her finger!!". As I let out "Oops...I'm a little nervous!!",
the entire group roared in laughter.

  But, when I sang "The Vows Go Unbroken" by the late Kenny
Rogers (aka "The Gambler"), there wasn't a dry eye in the house.
To this day, nearly 18 years later, I still can't look at the
wedding video without crying like a baby.

  Afterwards, my new wife and I were changing out of our
wedding duds (before the ceremony, as the potluck was ending,
the preacher said "I've got to go put my marrying clothes on"),
and it was taking a bit to switch out. We were in a small room,
and for obvious reasons, had closed and locked the door. The
guy who was my best man (he died 5 months after my wife died...
she had a heart attack, he had cancer), knocked on the door,
and asked "What are you doing in there??". I wish I would've had 
my wits about me...I would've replied "Playing Strip Poker". 

 GP> Maybe some guest jokers?

  So the one from Batman is on lunch break?? 

 GP> Quotes on parenting:

 GP> “Parenthood is a journey except it's just traveling from room to room
 GP> putting away the same toys all day long.” —@OneFunnyMummy

  Or wrap up the toys they haven't touched in awhile, and give
them as Christmas presents (one parent did this, and the kids
thought they were new...but they had forgotten they hadn't played
with them in a long time).

 GP> “Parenting is mostly just informing kids how many more minutes they
 GP> have of something.” —@yoyoha

  And, the clock is ticking. 

 GP> “You know you're a parent when you've washed yourself with baby wipes
 GP> to save time in the morning.” —Anonymous

  That's for sure!!

 GP> “I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said, ‘Not yet, but we placed an
 GP> ad.’" —Dana Snow

  

 GP> “Driving around at 3am with soft music on the radio isn't normal, but
 GP> as a parent it is.” —@Batman1285

  Kids are like kitties...it's play time at 3am.

 GP> “My favorite part of parenting is after I drop my kids off at school.
 GP> I’m kidding. It’s after they go to bed.” —@CallMeDraper

  As one commercial noted "Until they relax, I can't relax".

 GP> “Having children is like living in a frat house — nobody sleeps,
 GP> everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.” —Ray Romano

  Basically.

Daryl

... Well, to be frank, I'd have to change my name.
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