10 Rules of EMS
1. Air goes in and out, blood goes round and round, any variation on
   this is a bad thing.
2. The more equipment you see on a Paramedic's belt, the newer he is.
3. All bleeding stops...eventually.
4. All people will eventually die, no matter what you do.
5. If the child is quiet, be scared.
6. If the patient vomits, try to hold the head to the side of the rig
   with the least difficult cleanable equipment.
7. When responding to a call, always remember that your ambulance was
   built by the lowest bidder.
8. Always know WHEN to get out of Dodge.
9. Always know HOW to get out of Dodge.
10.Don't go INTO Dodge without the Marshall.
Murphy's Laws of EMS
The First Rule of Equipment:
Any piece of life-saving equipment will never malfunction or fail until:
a) You need it to save a life, or
b) The salesman leaves.
The Other Rules of Equipment:
Interchangeable parts don't
Leakproof seals will
Self-starters won't
From the September 96 Dispatch, a newsletter for the Inland Empire EMS,
Wa.
der
... If I eat scrambled eggs and brains, will I be smarter?
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