From: Dragon lite
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Going to K-Mart By Age
 Scenario: 

You
are in the  middle of some kind of project around the house mowing the
lawn, putting a new  fence in, painting the living room, or whatever. 
You are hot and sweaty,  covered in dirt or paint.  You have your old
work clothes on.  You  know, the outfit - shorts with the hole in
crotch, old T-shirt with a stain  from who knows what, and an old pair
of tennis shoes.  Right in the middle  of this great home improvement
project you realize you need to run to K-Mart  to get something to help
complete the job.
  
Depending on your  age you might do the following:
  
In  your 20's:
Stop
what you are  doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush
your teeth, floss,  and put on clean clothes.  Check yourself in the
mirror and flex.  Add  a dab of your favorite cologne because you never
know, you just might meet some  hot chick while standing in the
checkout lane.  You went to school with the  pretty girl running the
register..
 
In  your 30's:
Stop
what you are  doing, put on clean shorts and shirt.  Change shoes.  You
married the  hot chick so no need for much else.  Wash your hands and
comb your  hair.  Check yourself in the mirror.  Still got it.  Add a
shot  of your favorite cologne to cover the smell.  The cute girl
running the  register is the kid sister to someone you went to school 
with.
 
In  your 40's:
Stop what you are  doing. Put a
sweatshirt that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of  your
shorts.  Put on different shoes and a hat.  Wash your  hands.  Your
bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you don't want to  waste any
of it on a trip to K-Mart.  Check yourself in the mirror and do  more
sucking in than flexing.  The spicy young thing running the register 
is your daughter's age and you feel weird thinking she is spicy..
  
In  your 50's:    
Stop
what you are  doing.  Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your hands onto
your shirt.   Change shoes because you don't want to get dirt in your
new sports car.   Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to
wear that shirt  anymore because it makes you look fat.  The Cutie
running the register  smiles when she sees you coming and you think you
still have it.  Then you  remember the hat you have on is from Buddy's
Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I  Got Worms.'
 
 In  your 60's:
Stop
what you are  doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the dog shit off
your shoes The  mirror was shattered when you were in your 50's. You
hope you have  underwear on so nothing hangs out the hole in your
pants. The girl running the  register may be cute, but you don't have
your glasses on so you are not  sure.
  
In  your 70's:
Stop
what you are  doing. Wait to go to K-Mart until they have your
prescriptions ready,  too.  Don't even notice the dog shit on your
shoes. The young thing at  the register smiles at you because you
remind her of her grandfather.
  
In  your 80's:
Stop what you
are  doing.  Start again.  Then stop again.  Now you remember you 
needed to go to K-Mart.  Go to K-Mart and wander around trying to
think  what the hell it is you are looking for. You went to school with
the old lady  who greeted you at the front door.


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Sometimes you have to go out on a limb to turn over a new leaf



Don't trust his words, trust his actions.


     
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