From: Rai A
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The Golfing Nun 
 
A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and plunks down into a chair. She
lets out a sigh heavy with frustration. 

"What troubles you, Sister?" asks the Mother Superior. "I
thought this was the day you spent with your family." 

"It was," sighed the Sister. "And I went to play golf with
my brother. We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a
talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ." 

"I seem to recall that," the Mother Superior agreed. "So I
take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?" 

"Far from it," snorted the Sister. "In fact, I even took the
Lord's name in vain today!" 

"Goodness, Sister!" gasped the Mother Superior, astonished.
"You must tell me all about it!" 

"Well, we were on the fifth tee...and this hole is a monster, Mother -
540 yard Par 5, with a nasty dogleg left and a hidden green and I hit the
drive of my life. I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made. And it's
flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted and it hits a bird
in mid-flight not 100 yards off the tee!" 

"Oh my!" commiserated the Mother. "How unfortunate! But
surely that didn't make you blaspheme, Sister!" 

"No, that wasn't
 
it," admitted Sister. "While I was still trying to fathom what
had happened, this squirrel runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs
off down the fairway!" 

"Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!" sympathized Mother. 

"But I didn't, Mother Superior!" sobbed the Sister. "And I
was so proud of myself! And while I was pondering whether this was a sign
from God, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies
off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!" 

"So that's when you cursed," said the Mother with a knowing smile. 

"Nope, that wasn't it either," cried the Sister, anguished,
"because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started
struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball
popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!" 

Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest,
fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said... 

"You missed the fucking putt, didn't you?"

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Sometimes you have to go out on a limb to turn over a new leaf

Don't trust his words, trust his actions.





      

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