From: Rai A
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A Drunk's Night Before Christmas

'Twas the 
night before Christmas and all through the house,
There were bottles of booze 
left around by some louse.
When through the North window there came a loud 
yell
I sprang to my feet to see what the hell...

And what to my 
bloodshot eyes should I see,
But eight drunken reindeer caught up in a 
tree.
And there in the branches, was a man with a sleigh.
I knew it was 
Santa, quite tiddley and gay.

Staggering nearer those eight reindeer 
came,
While he belched and hiccoughed and called them by name
"On Whiskey! 
On Vodka! we ain't got all night,
You too, Gin and Brandy, now all do it 
right!

Clamber up on the roof, and get off this wall,
Get going you 
rummies, we've still got a long haul!"
So up on the roof went the reindeer 
and sleigh,
But a tree branch hit Santa before he could sway.

And then 
to my ears like the roll of a barrel,
A hell of a noise that was no Christmas 
carol.
So I pulled in my head and I cocked a sharp ear,
Down the chimney 
he plunged, landing smack on his rear.

He was both plump and chubby, and 
tried to stand right,
But he didn't fool me, he was high as a kite.
He 
spoke not a word but went straight to work
And missed half the stockings, the 
drunken old jerk.

Then putting his thumb to the end of his nose,
He 
fluttered his fingers as he quoted prose.
As he sprung for his sleigh at so 
hasty a pace,
He tripped on a shingle and he slid on his face.

But I 
heard him call back as he passed out of sight,
"Merry Christmas, you lushes, 
now really get tight!"

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Sometimes you have to go out on a limb to turn over a new leaf



Don't trust his words, trust his actions.

 



  






      

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