-=> Quoting Desiree Louvre to Regina Finan <=-
 -=> While eating Chocolate, Desiree had this to say: <=-
 
 RF> Does Corey have ODD too?  I can't remember if you said.  All I know
 DL> YES!!!!! 
 
 I thought I saw this, but wasn't sure.  Jeremy is getting really mouthy
 lately again.  But we are find things to keep him busy and more controlled.
 We are going to redo our kitchen.  I put in a program to design it and
 got frustrated with it.  Jeremy took it over and figure out the program
 and started measuring my kitchen up.  I finally had to threaten him to
 come to bed.
 My other son is just ADD/LD and alot easier to handle.  This ODD is
 so hard.
 RF> is Jeremy does and his attitude toward parental authority stinks.
 RF> Although it is better than a few years ago.
 DL> Cory's attitude stinks big time! His patterns fluctuate from time to
 DL> time. He is never consistent. Part of the problem with Cory's attitudes
 DL> is he doesn't see himself as being 7. He thinks he can say, do and act
 DL> just like anyone else does. (Yeah, right!) I haven't seen any
 DL> significant changes in Cory's ODD... not even coming off the clonidine.
 DL> He does have one sign when his attitude has (temporarily) improved...
 DL> when I ask him to do something, he says "yes, mommy". This is the only
 DL> time he will say this. 
 I must be fortunate then.  Jeremy does things for me and gets really pleased
 if I involve him in the family matters (I was told this is what he needs, to
 feel and understand a family unit).  He makes me tea and if I ask him to
 get a light bulb or something he does it with enthusiam .  I will say
 thank you and he usually always says your welcome.  Jeremy is so charming
 at times I can't believe the change.  If he sees me crying he trys so
 hard to be good to me.  Other times I feel I could have a heart attack
 and he would not flinch.  Although I am probably wrong.
 DL> Aren't parental reserves great!!! David seems to think he can 'take'
 DL> his father... I hope he never finds out. David will be in for a rude
 DL> awakening. Even more than the one he's about to get. ;)
 
 Yeppers. although I am physically weaker than years ago.  But my husband
 is a modernization contractor and he is out there doing physical labor
 every day.  
 RF> this day they know there is only so far they can go.
 DL> This has been a tough lesson for Cory and one he still hasn't learned.
 DL> He pushes that threshold often.
 
 Jeremy still does to, except for physical abuse on me.  He won't touch
 me in that regard.  First time in a long time Jeremy got to me really bad.
 Jeremy was getting disciplined and he decided it was time to play hide and
 seek.  I got so frustrated I threw a metal pole against the wall.  He
 came out of hiding immediately.  So I guess he found out he pushed passed
 the limit.  Now I have a dent to repair.  But all in all, throwing the
 pole felt really good.  I wanted to throw it threw the glass, but reasonable
 as I am, I managed to control myself enough to just hit the wall.
 Jeremy won't do that again for a long time.  He will remember how ticked
 I got and it will be at least 6 months before he pushes this one again.
 Of course, this is just one facet in his many worlds of aggravations.
 The other day we had friends over and they have a child who is ADHD.
 Jeremy and him got along okay.  Several times I thought maybe a fight
 was going to happen, but it didn't.  One time Jeremy did hit him several
 times, but it was more like soft taps.  I saw the anger in Jeremy's eyes,
 but he controlled himself and then took several deeps breaths and walked
 away.  I almost fainted as I saw this control.  I see it more and more
 now.  Oh, he still hits and kicks his brother and sister, but at times
 I do see the control happen.  I don't ever see this type of fighting with
 another child.  This is a first in a long time and only because they
 both have ADHD and purposely try to aggravate each other.  If not with
 words, but also poking and standing in each other's way and stuff.  OBTW,
 he use to punch other kids, but doesn't any more.
 DL> Geez... I hope so. I get up in the mornings to newspapers everywhere,
 DL> take on various things holding them together, toilet paper covering the
 DL> bathroom floor and whatever else Cory was interested in getting into.
 DL> I'm very thankful he doesn't get dressed and go outside like the little
 DL> boy down- stairs.
 My daughter Sara, is a sleep walker.  I have caught her several times at
 the front door, but she can't unlock it in her sleep.  Although, she hasn't
 done this since we moved here several months ago.
 DL> Picture this: The other morning about 5 am, his father saw our bedroom
 DL> door open then close and a few seconds later on my side of the bed,
 DL> Cory's hand came up onto my nightstand, feel around for something
 DL> (probably looking for something edible like chocolate, which I hide in
 DL> the closet), rummage through some paper and leave. All this was done
 DL> basically on his belly. Ron then saw the door open and asked Cory what
 DL> he was doing in our room. Cory jumped up and had the audacity to say he
 DL> wasn't in there! He's very quiet. When he gets up in the morning and
 DL> our door is open he will close it. Fortunately his sister has a
 DL> piercing scream and can wake up the neighbors with it. 
 DL> This is a typical morning around here.
 
 Sounds like the way it use to be around here.  I remember waking up and
 finding them trying to bake cookies, flour everywhere ans such.  Things
 are not like that around here anymore.  I get up rather early and Jeremy
 can't sleep at nite so consequently I am up before everyone else.  The
 most that happens here is the bread opened and maybe a can of veggies or
 something.  He will forget to eat when he is involved.  With the way
 this house is situated right now we still have things on the kitchen
 table, like our microwave.  So when I cook, eveyone gets a plate and
 eats in the living room.  My furniture is tore up where Jeremy and Jonathon
 took a knife and shredded it.  This was a few years ago.  I am waiting to
 replace it when I see no more destruction, which is about here.  Anyway,
 the floor does not have carpet yet and is tiled.  I sometimes don't fight
 with Jeremy to eat.  He usually is not hungry at dinner time and if he
 is being really good, I don't try to change the situation.  Then we all
 forget and Jeremy will tell me he needs to eat.  Drives me nuts, but
 contrary to what is usual for an ADHD child, Jeremy can not have full
 structure.  To do so frustrates him to act worse.  It has to do with
 control and he needs to feel control all the time (even though he doesn't
 have it emotionally).  It also has to do with feeling clostrophobic.
 Jeremy and I both have this.
 DL> Sounds like he could be a good candidate for outgrowing most of the
 DL> ADHD as he gets older.
 
 Actually, I think maybe he is just learning to cope.  I was told my
 parenting skills are very positive and that Jeremy is learning from them.
 RF> without it.  Then again, I see the struggle at trying to study.  If he
 RF> didn't have a hard time concentrating I would do without.  I know the
 DL> But this can only help him improve everything. There is much pride in
 DL> learning to do things for oneself. I see this in Cory from time to
 DL> time. And the fact that Jeremy is *trying* says alot! He sounds like a
 DL> great kid! :)
 
 Don't let things fool you.  Yes I think all my kids are great kids, but
 Jeremy is one that tries so hard to break me and has succeeded at times.
 I got up and 5 AM this morning and things are so quiet.  My husband is
 sleeping in the computer room (I think he has the flu).  Kids are
 sleeping and I am in my glory for a while longer.  So quiet.
 Regina
... All I need is a Wave and a board to surf it on.
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