From: Stephen
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Hi All,

                             Southern Law
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Questions asked in a courtroom can be very revealing... especially in
the South. Even of an old, sweet lady many would be happy to call
grandma.

In a trial in the heart of the South, a prosecuting attorney called
his first witness, a grandmotherly woman he had known since childhood,
to the stand.

He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Whitaker, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Coolidge. I've known you
since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big
disappointment to me. You lie, cheat, you manipulate people and talk
about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you
haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more
than a two-bit lawyer. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
the room and asked, "Mrs. Whitaker, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Of course, I do. I've known Mr. Johnson since he
was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking
problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law
practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney turned red with embarressment.

The judge upon hearing the questions and answers thusfar asked both
counselors to approach the bench. In a very quiet voice he said, "If
either of you asks her if she knows me, I'll throw you in jail for
contempt."
 


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