A blonde friend of mine sent me these. 

 BLONDE JOKES
 Did you hear about the two blondes that froze to
 death in a drive-in movie?
 They went to see " Closed for the Winter."

 **********************
 Why did the blonde resolve to have only 3 children?
 She heard 1 out of every 4 children born in the
 world is Chinese.

 ********************
 A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one
 night with the tip of her index finger shot off.
 "How did this happen?" the doctor asked.
 "Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde
 replied.
 "What? You tried to commit suicide by shooting your
 finger off?"
 "No, Silly! First I put the gun to my chest, and I
thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast
implants, I'm not shooting myself in the chest."
 "So then?" asked the doctor.
 "Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought : I
 just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I'm
 not shooting myself in the mouth."
 "And then?"
 " Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This
 is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in
 the other ear before I pulled the trigger."

 **************************
 Did you hear about the tragic accident at the mall?
 There was a power outage, and eight blondes were
 stuck on the escalators for over four hours.

 *************************
 A blonde was driving home after a game and got
 caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was
 covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a
 repair shop. The shop owner saw she was a blonde and
 decided to have some fun. He told her just to go
 home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and
 all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde went
 home, got down on her hands and knees and started
 blowing int o her tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she
 blew a little harder; still nothing happened. Her
 blonde roommate came out and asked, "What are you
 doing?"
 The first blonde told her how the repairman had
 instructed her to blow into the tail pipe to make
 the dents pop out. The roommate rolled her eyes and
 said, "Uh, like hello! You need to roll up the
 windows first!"

 ***************************
 A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes
 checked for glasses. The doctor told her to read
 various letters with the left eye while covering the
 right eye. She got so mixed up on which eye was
 which that the eye doctor impatiently took a paper
 lunch bag, poked a hole in it for her to see
 through, covered the appropriate eye and asked her
 to read the letters. As she did so, he noticed tears
 streaming down her face. "Look, there's no need to
 get emotional about getting glasses."
 "I know," agreed the blonde, "But I kind of had my
 heart set on wire frames."

 ****************************
 A blonde was shopping at a Target Store
 and came across a silver thermos. She was quite
 fascinated by it, so she picked it up and asked the
 clerk what it was. The clerk said, "Why, that's a
 thermos; it keeps hot things hot and cold things
 cold."
 "Wow, that's amazing! I'm going to buy it!" She
 bought the thermos and took it to work the next day.
 Her boss saw it on her desk and asked, "What's
 that?"
 "Why, that's a thermos; it keeps hot things hot and
 cold things cold."
 Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?"
"Two
 popsicles, and some coffee."

 *****************************
 AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST.....
 A bl onde goes to work one morning crying her eyes
 out. Sympathet ically, her boss asks, "What's the
 matter?"
 "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that
 my mother had passed away."
 Feeling very sorry for her, he says, "Why don't you
 go home for the day, we aren't terribly busy. Just
 take the day off to relax and rest."
 "Thanks, but I'd be better off here. I need to keep
 my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing
 that here." The boss agrees and allows her to work
 as usual.
 A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on
 her. He looks over and sees her crying hysterically.

 "What's so bad now? Are you gonna be okay?" he asks.

 "No!" exclaims the blonde. "I just received a
 horrible call from my sister; she said her Mom died
 too!"


--- PPoint 3.01