Hello dear Sister,
 
The differences of in Al-anon and CoDA are significant.Co-depency is a 
disease all it's own.  The First Step speaks to that...Co-dependence claim to 
be powerless over others...while Al-anons are still claiming powerlessness 
over alcohol. All Al-Anons are co-dependents, but not all Co-dependents are 
Al-Anons. 
 
The program of CoDA is about focusing on, and healing ourselves. It's about 
letting others, heal and focus on themselves, or not if they choose not to.  
 
See if your lady friend has the CoDA Big Book.  There are many other fine 
books, including STEP workbooks for co-dependency.  Sponsoring in CoDA is 
different than in AA.  Sponsoring is more about step work and accountability 
than advice giving or discussing issues.  You lady friend does ( in my 
opinion ) need to work the Steps of CoDA  AA steps don't work on CoDA issues.
 
 
> My approach has been, so far, as long as it seems to be working for
> both of us, to discuss it with her - i e  if it works, don't fix it.
 
Since you asked...Since your friend is a new commer, and you have never been 
in the program then you may have no way of telling what is working and what 
isn't.  
 
> (I am really rather seriously depressed this year - much worse than
> usual - and it worries me, but I don't know anything constructive I can
> do about it off hand, that I haven't tried)
 
I will pray for you!!!  I'll send some good thoughts your way!!
 
Hugs!!
 
Thom 
--- DB 1.58/001758
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