-=> Quoting Michael Kirst to Steven Sterner <=-
 MK> Steven Sterner wrote in a message to Michael Kirst:
 
 MK> Is this somehow associated with an adoption?
 
 SS> Why? Do you have a need to know?
 MK> I will ignore the apparent attitude problem being conveyed and just
 MK> respond to why I should care.  And there are several reasons that come
 MK> to mind... 
There was/is no attitude problem there...just a basic human response to
someone who "questions" someone else for no reason (I have been in FIDO
long enough to see "wanna-B-moderators". Had you identified yourself I
would have responded the same anyway (by answering your question) but I 
would have given you a :>
 MK> One of which is that your message appeared to be more of a "missing
 MK> person's" type of search than a search for birth family members. 
 MK> And were that the case, your message would have belonged in the
 MK> Missing Person's echo.
Missing persons = sounds like someone looking for adopt-ee-ive family 
members. I saw no reason to put in a "I am the father/son qualifier". 
I am not shy by any means (which you will know before this msg is over)
but I have always learned that information is a "need to know basis".
 MK> Your message made no mention that the people being searched for
 MK> were birth-family members.  Nor did it mention that the person who
 MK> was searching might be an adoptee.  Again, whether your message
 MK> belonged in this echo or another more appropriate echo was not
 MK> easily identifiable from your message.
Most moderators (yes I agree you can do what you wish and how...every
moderator has this right) would identify themselves as such when they
are questioning the validity of a post or are trying to stop a thread.
If they didn't then everyone and there mother (be it adoptive or birth)
would be trying to moderate your echo...and I am sure there is nothing
that annoys you quicker than that (except the "High Bud, just logged on
why don't you call me anymore" type ones).
 MK> I am one of the people in this echo who tries to help people in
 MK> their searches because I want any birth-family member who is
 MK> searching for an adoptee to find that adoptee just like I want any
 MK> adoptee who is searching for birth-family members to find those
 MK> birth-family members.  I also have this very strong dislike for
 MK> sealed records. 
Ah...to get us on topic (hehe, I can moderate to) my biggest problem is
where a b-parent can call an agency and they will call the child to ask
if contact is ok...but if the child calls the inquiry goes on file. If it
works one way it should be a two way street. Sealed records are a different
story though...I would not want my child/parent contacting me if for some
reason I did not wish it. I strongly believe though that if someone was 
looking for me/I for them that a "friendly" call should be placed by a 3rd
party to find out if contact would be acceptable. No sales pitch...no 
ressure
just a simple inquiry.
 MK> Depending on whether your message concerned a birth-mother
 MK> searching, it might have been a candidate for cross-posting into the
 MK> BIRTHMOTHERS echo by that echo's moderator to increase the chances
 MK> of a possible find as a result of the increased "exposure" gained by
 MK> that cross-posting.
FYI..."Theresa" is a b-mother...and I never heard of it before but here it is
 BIRTHMOTHERS               A forum for those who gave up a child to adoption
(Oh before I replied I tried to identify you but the echolist my hub gives
out...like the above...does not list moderators.
 MK> And perhaps the most important reason...  I am the moderator of
 MK> this echo.  And *-that-* makes anything in this echo my business.  I
 MK> prefer to not have to post over my "official" signature block
 MK> unless doing so is required by circumstances since it be less
 MK> friendly. 
So it is your choice but we would not have had this lovely chat had you put
it in there...with a 3 line signature and a origin line I am sure it could 
be put in...IMHO.
 SS> And to answer your question yes.
 MK> In the future, you might wish to make that fact more clearly
 MK> identifiable from your posting(s) if needed.
And here is the only "problem" I have...perhaps if I am to be a little 
clearer in my posts perhaps you should identify yourself as well. If all
the facts are out it makes things alot more clearly identifiable...when
needed of course.
 MK> Michael Kirst
 MK> f/k/a Christopher Lee Backus
 MK> Sysop of The Noble House BBS
Steven Sterner NON-Moderator
f/k/a Me, Myself and I
Sysop of the TIME ZONE
P.S. I knew your name from somewhere before I posted my reply...I just 
couldn't place it until a couple days after when you posted the list of
origin lines. As a matter of fact I think you sent me that program for 
use here...or told me what it was. Anyway...great echo...and hopefully
someone will lead me in the right direction.
... We now return to our regularly scheduled flame-throwing.
--- GEcho 1.00
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