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Newsgroups: fido.mensa
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From: Miles Maxted 
Date: Wed, 24 Dec 03 17:19:04 +0100
Subject: Christmas Carols 4 tonit
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Organization: === Maxie BBS.  Ak, NZ +64 9 444-0989 ===
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Morning, All....

As you fidget at the table tonight, wrapping those last minute 
pressies and wondering why the sellotape dispenser has taken such 
a dislike to you,  this list of Christmas Carols For the 
Psychiatrically Challenged might well guide you in your choise of 
which Carol to play next...  just identify your current status and 
select...

Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas

Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets 
and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and 
Trees and Fire Hydrants and...

Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me

Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an 
Open Fire

Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm 
Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell You Why

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ---Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, 
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle 
Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells...

Agoraphobia --- I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't 
Leave My House

Autistic --- Jingle Bell Rock and Rock and Rock and Rock...

Senile Dementia --- Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My 
House in My Slippers and Robe

Oppositional Defiant Disorder --- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus 
So I Burned Down the House

Social Anxiety Disorder --- Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas 
While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate


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