-=> Quoting Tim Dill to Marge Clark <=-
       Hi Tim,
 TD> Marge, I agree some what, however I will not justify anything that I
 TD> have said here or there.  I am just relating my experiences over the
 TD> past few years.
       Well Tim I agree with you whole heartedly about this thats why they
       say If it works don't fix. If you have managed to stay sober than
       don't worry about it just keep doing what you are doing.
 TD> The second got me through all my steps up to nine then tried to
 TD> convert me to christianity, so I let him go.
       I have had sponsors tell me that they can't sponsor me cause I
       am Wiccan and therefore evil, so much for how they work their
       program.
 TD> The next was Tom K. he is forever working with newcomers
 TD> and never returns his calls when I leave a message..
 TD> so I quit calling (useless eh?)
       My last one was like this as well, but also had the audacity to tell
       you you didn't want the program because you didn't chase her.
 TD> The next person on my list is Joe K., he and I have a sorta working
 TD> relationship. He gives me the encouragement to continue along my
 TD> chosen path. As for step input I have Mike B. the guy I hang with at
 TD> work. He gets me to explore the tough ones even if the relationship is
 TD> not a formal one.
       Sometimes you get more out of these kinds of relationships than
       you do with sponsors. I had another person tell me that it was
       all right for her to eat certain things (OA) and it wasn't all
       right for me. She told me that when I have 10 yrs abstinent than
       I could eat those things as well. Well guess why I didn't have ten
       yrs. abstinent. She also drank and told me that that was all right
       as well. I gave her up real quick.
 TD> I am not hiding out. I just shared with my Dad this weekend of
 TD> what spiritual path I am on (Wicca.. yes Harriet except for
 TD> my brother and my Mom, I am out of the broom closet and I left
 TD> some excellent text files with my Dad that will prolly be
 TD> shared with my Mom)
       I have not come out of the broom closet yet (and BTW I loved that
       saying) as I don't feel it is necassary however if you came over
       it would be very obvious what I am . I have all of my tools and
       cauldron out in the open in hutch with glass doors. Have all my
       incense and oils there too. I do not adverstise it but do not hide
       it either.
 TD> A tough choice, but in order to be true to myself I had to let
 TD> my Dad know why he saw so many changes in me the last year
 TD> or so.. even if he does not understand it.
       I think that it is great that you were able to do this.
 TD> I have asked around and so far no one who has made the commitment
 TD> to help me along the way in the past year or so has kept the
 TD> commitment to be available.. and it seems to be the norm in L.A.
 TD> AA/NA..
       This is unfortunately becoming the way of the program in all places.
       I am in NY and have had some of the sponsors that you have mentioned.
       As well as that it appears that program became a very doggy dog place.
       Yes everyone says hello in the meetings and acts very friendly but
       once you leave the rooms you are very much on your own. I made the
       decision about 4 yrs ago that if I was to be alone in the rooms I
       didn't need them. I have been sober and clean for 14 yrs and the only
       meetings that I attend to is the ones on this machine and I have 
otten
       more support and help from these people than I have in the 10 yrs.
       that I have been back here in NY. It would be very nice to have 
rogram
       the way it was when I first entered it. Where people gave a hoot about
       the others in the meeting. I use to know that if I didn't call anyone
       or go to a meeting in several weeks that someone would be there to
       knock my door down and make sure I am all right. Today I have gone to
       meetings for over a year and consistently went and even spoke to a few
       of the members and then when I became sick and couldn't go no one even
       cared enough to see if I was alive or dead. To say the least this hurt
       to no extent and I didn't need this in my life at all. So that is what
       I wanted to relate to you with. Hope that maybe we can chat some.
       Esther
 
... take my hand you'll never find another quite like mine.
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