From: Richard Webb 
Subject: Re: call for discussion -- h*lp!
Hello Christine,
Recently you wrote:
   >carry the nonjudgmental, accepting approach?  Without judgment in
   >certain circumstances, especially where saying nothing can be
   >harmful, perhaps for a lifetime, there are no standards.
   >How accepting should I be when children of parents with proper
   >information, who should know better, manifest socially inappropriate
   >behavior such as incessnt 'blindisms'?  How accepting should one be
   >when the stigma of being labeled 'blind' is more significant and
   >worrisome than eyestrain, headches, performance in school (and
   >later on the job) that is below ability because the person doesn't
   >want to use techniques that 'only' blind people use?  How accepting
   >can a leader be when criticism is leveled behind her back, not
   >allowing for frank open discussion of the issues, not allowing for
   >growth and a proper sense of trust and community? At one point does
   >one take a stand?  And since this group is part of the NFB, how
   >accepting must one be despite the harm it could do the work the
   >organization is trying to do in changing what it means to be blind?
I'd say your first step is to have an informative parents' seminar,
explaining such things as our definition of blindness, alternative
techniques, etc.
I think with an informative day of parents' education, you can turn
some of these folks around.
Don't give up on those who weren't turned around at the session.
Provide them literature, and most importantly, good positive role
models for their kids.
Those who don't eventually come to the proper attitudes about their
childrens' blindness won't stay too loong anyway.
   >I'm not trying to find reasons to be 'militant' -- I'm trying to
   >find the right, or at least a reasonable balance, between tough,
   >no-nonsense leadership and gentle, loving guidance?  I'm at a point
   >where I am starting to wonder if I simply am not personally a good
   >leader; perhaps a more politically savvy person could get through
   >to more of the parents. Perhaps I allow my desire to prevent the
   >heartaches and difficulties I had as a child for the kids interfere
   >with my need to be flexible.  But I have barely said anything in
   >the face of a chapter which displays nothing Federationist except
   >its name.  We offer annually the opportunity to go to conventions
   >and give a reasonable amount of financial assistance; no one went
   >this year; there was no interest.  No interest in the state
   >convention; virtually no interest in going to the national center.
   >Part of it is complacency, because NY has a pretty good service
   >record for blind children, as compared with many other places.  I
   >could ramble on, but you get the idea.  One thing that bothers me
   >the most is an almost hostile not-in-my-backyard attitude toward
   >multiply-disabled blind children.
YOu do have a problem.  This is why I think a seminar, with some
demonstrations, but a lot of talks by experienced federationists might
be helpful to the parents.
From what I"ve heard over the years, the situation for rehab for blind
adults in NY is less than desirable.  It's important to get these
parents attention and educate them, so they can properly guide their
children.
Diplomacy in the face of such a situation is difficult, at best.  I
don't envy you your job.
REgards,
Richard Webb
Electric Spider Productions
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