http://datingasociopath.com/2013/06/21/how-to-cope-with-sociopath-ruining-and-s
mear-campaigns/

After the hearts and flowers of the Sociopath seduction, the confusion
of the gaming period, when your emotions were exploited and
manipulated to control you. When the relationship ends, what can
follow, is some of the worst emotional abuse that you have ever
experienced.

If you have read this blog from the beginning, you would know that the
Sociopath needs to keep control.

She/he sees you as someone that they own. After they have discarded
you, they then need to destroy you. We already know that there are
some people who are serial killers. Most Sociopaths are not like this.
In fact a lot are not even violent. What this type of Sociopath will
do is to ruin and damage your emotional state, your life, and damage
or destroy everything left that you ‘value' so that you are left
feeling absolutely destroyed (metaphorically killed). Whilst the
sociopath will not destroy you and kill you in a literal sense, they
kill you in another way.

You should remember in the beginning, when the Sociopath mirrored you,
acting just like you, mirroring you to offer you everything that you
wanted. Moving on from that the Sociopath played victim, you felt
sorry for him/her and they ‘exposed' their weaknesses and
vulnerabilities (which were mostly manipulative lies), you felt safe
to expose your own weaknesses.

It is now those very weaknesses that the Sociopath uses to control
you. He/she will threaten to expose you and will lie about you, using
a thread of truth to make the lies that they tell sound believable.

The Sociopath has no conscience. So does not feel bad about
terrorising your life. He does not feel remorse, guilt or shame. The
sociopath will continue to make your life hell, until in his/her mind
you are literally ‘dead'.

Stop Playing the Game

Unless you are an incredibly strong person, with no care at all for
the consequences (I was), there is one thing that you need to do more
than anything.

STOP PLAYING THE GAME!!!!

The sociopath is still playing the game when he is carrying out
ruining and smear campaigns, and will not stop until you are
destroyed. They gain too much pleasure from seeing you destroyed. What
really does NOT work (and will make things worse)

•Showing at any time, how upset you are, and how his/her actions are
affecting you. The sociopath is looking for emotion. Is looking to
control you. Is looking for reaction.

•Do NOT give emotion/reaction anything. By doing so, this motivates
the sociopath to destroy those emotions (you are still living), so the
game continues

•Do not respond to contact

•Do not write a personal blog about them, and mention them by name

•Do not write how you are feeling over social networks

•Do not engage with the Sociopath in any way at all BLOCK ALL CONTACT

•Do not talk to, or confide in people who are mutual friends. Only
confide in people that you trust

•Do not expect other people to understand. Unless they are trained
psychologists, they won't understand

When you respond, in anyway at all, you are feeding the Sociopath
further Narcissistic Supply. This is what they want. It makes them
feel good.

•Remember that they are the expert liars, and experts at being
manipulative and deceptive – NOT YOU!!!

You need to stop playing the game. Each time you respond. Each time to
give a reaction, you are playing the game. The sociopath likes two
things

•Winning

•Being in Control

Take away those two things. The Sociopath will get bored eventually.
Has he/she not taken enough?

What Can You Do?

•Use the law to control the Sociopath. Each time something happens,
call the police

•Keep evidence of EVERYTHING

•Keep calling the police

•Contact a local DV unit in your area, to ensure that you get support
(Google or your phone directory for domestic violent services in your
area) find someone else who is trained has experience to help you with
this – A DV worker offer support and help you to obtain an injunction
order. This is harassment, there are legal remedies against harassment

•Find victim support groups, and talk to others who really do
understand

•The Sociopath is NOT the person to ask to stop the behaviour (he/she
likely won't)

•ONLY spend time and confide in those people who you trust. Remember
that the Sociopath is likely spreading lies about you, saying how
‘crazy and obsessed' you are. REMOVE yourself from this, even if only
temporarily

•Withdraw from ‘mutual friends' so that the Sociopath is unable to use
third party people to continue the abuse (whilst looking like an angel
and you looking like the nut job)

•Remember that this will NOT go on forever

•By responding you are giving the Sociopath supply

•Only legal remedies will stop the Sociopath – they will not listen to
begging, pleading any of this, in fact this can make things worse

•Remove yourself. Stop focusing on the Sociopaths behaviour. Instead
focus on you

•Do NOT. I repeat DO NOT respond in anyway. When you respond with
tears, begging, pleads to stop. You are simply giving the Sociopath
exactly what they want.

Please stop playing the game with the Sociopath. Yes I know that this
is affecting YOUR life. It is. If someone was at you with a knife and
terrorising you… who do you think would help you more? The Psycho, or
the Police and third party services who could offer support?

Stop playing the game with them

•Do not talk to people who have interaction with them

•Do not look at their social networking

•Block their number on your phone, block social networking

Obtain support from people who will genuinely support you. Not those
people who ask what is going on, because they love the drama. This
will only backfire on you. The Sociopath will later use this against
you too.

You might be frightened. The Sociopath might threaten you, that if you
report they will do further actions against you. Let them carry on. It
can't get worse, can it?

It is now time to find support for YOU. Remove yourself from the game
and let the Sociopath play the game with Law enforcement. Not
yourself…. start to free yourself. You cannot change the Sociopath's
behaviour. But you can change YOU!!

--- NewsGate v1.0 gamma 2