On Monday December 23 1996, Steve Ross snickered to Dennis Mummert.
 DM>SR>> "Probably one hell of a fire sale (before the ordinance is 
dopted),"
 DM>SR>> he
 >>SR> said.  "I'd probably do a year's worth of business in a couple of
 >>SR> days."
 DM>> Now I know what the problem with the lawyers is.
 SR> Hi Dennis,
 SR> Yeah, they really liked that fire sale remark.  Over the weekend, this
 SR> is what they had to say about it in my girlfriend's town:
 SR> Newspaper Editorial
 SR> ===================
 SR> Why banning the bong is the right thing to do
(snip)
 SR> If many more communities follow Spencer's lead and make it stick, we 
might
 SR> not convert drug addicts, but we may make it bit (sic) less convenient 
for
 SR> others to start.  And we may appear a little less the 
hypocrites-preaching
 SR> about the dangers of drug abuse to our kids while they can legally shop
 SR> for drug paraphernalia in our own hometowns.
   Boy, I sure hope they ban the sale of pop cans too. And come to think of 
it, they had better start making hardware shops, and anywhere that sells 
plumbing supplies start ID'ing customers to make sure they are over 21. Not 
too mention welding all faucets in the public schools, so you can't remove 
the aerator screens.. Wait a second, they better stop selling 2-liter bottles 
of soda also. Those things make excellent gravity bongs... They should 
probably also make it illegal to blow glass. Hmmm... Did I miss anything? Oh, 
wait, outlaw miracle grow, and all kinds of fertilizers. And fluorescent 
lights. And flood lights. And window planters. And peat moss. And POTting 
soil.  And any type of paper product thinner than cardboard. And scissors. I 
mean, if you can't buy scissors, you can't trim your pot plant, right? 
Everybody knows that's all anyone ever uses scissors for. Shoot, just make it 
a clean sweep, and ban any kind of fire making device. Matches, lighters, 
flint and steel. Better ban gas ranges too. Not to mention electric ranges. 
It takes a while, but you can light a joint with an electric range.
   The government just won't be happy until the masses have regressed to the 
caveman era, and the biggest danger we can threaten ourselves with is a big 
stick. Wait a second, how did cavemen get mates? Uh-oh, N.O.W. isn't going to 
like this one bit.... All their work towards womens rights, down the 
bes....
TTYl,
                      Ethan
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